She's Definitely Still Like That
by SunsetsandSunrise
Summary: Alison's back in Rosewood and things between Emily and Paige are unresolved. When Paige leaves for California, will Emily finally realize that Paige is the one she belongs with? Or will she give Alison a second chance? (Set after Season 4)*Emily/Paige POV* Paily.
1. Truth Be Told

**Authors Note:**

_So_

_1) I'm not a good writer, or at least not a very good one._

_2) This is probably going to suck but I enjoyed writing it nonetheless._

_3) I decided to experiment trying out something new &amp; since this seemed safer &amp; much more reasonable than drugs, I decided to go along with it._

_4) I love Paily so I thought I'd give it a shot._

_5) I really hope this isn't as bad as I think._

_6) Hope you guys enjoy._

_9) Feedback, no matter how cruel, is always welcome and appreciated._

* * *

_She was leaning against a tree near Emily's house_, her hands shook as she ran her fingers through her hair in frustration. She had come to try and talk to Emily but she had found she couldn't go any further without stopping and gathering her composure. It had been a couple weeks since the whole town had calmed down after the craziness that had followed when Alison revealed she was alive. There had been a lot of confusion, interrogations, and investigations. She wasn't even sure if it was all over. All she knew was that Alison was back and prancing around like she owned the world. She was back in the spotlight, brighter than before, as if nothing had happened. Paige wasn't sure if they had found out who A was, and she didn't care if Alison was still in danger or not. All she cared about was Emily.

She sighs as she thinks about her. A sigh full of frustration, sadness and misery. She closes her eyes and leanes her head back against the tree trunk.

She's tried to talk to Emily ever since that night she said goodbye to her. She would have called her, asked her to meet her somewhere, but her phone was in no working condition after she had thrown it into her pool in a fit of anger. But even if her phone was working she'd still want to talk to her in person, doing it by phone seemed...cowardly. Yet every time she tried to approach Emily she was surrounded by her friends, and by _her_. She wasn't quite ready to face that-

"Aren't you far from home pigskin?"

Paige jerks her head up, her train of thought coming to a complete stop as the voice she knows oh so well unconsciously makes her flinch. She chastises herself for letting the cause of her nightmares have that effect on her. She meets Alison's gaze and forces herself to not look down.

She pushes off the tree and stands straight, her jaw clenching as she fights off the urge to take a step back. "What do you want Alison?" She doesn't want to deal with her. She just wants to talk to Emily.

"I think the real question is, what do _you_ want? You have no reason to be here" Her sneer was cruel. Her eyes cold.

Paige's muscles tenses as she tries to keep her voice steady. She isn't going to let Alison intimidate her. Not anymore."Emily's here. And that's enough reason for me to be here."

Alison's chuckle is humorless and filled with cruelty. "Emily doesn't want you. She never has. Never will"

Paige's hand shake as she takes a step forward, "Then I'll have to hear it from her. Not you." She knows all Alison likes to do is torture people with words. Threats and lies that spun out of control if you let them.

Alison's lip curls back in a snarl. Paige has seen it before, and it would have frightened her once. But not now. She knows she's stronger than she had been. She won't let Alison drag her back to self hatred.

"Listen pigskin, get out of here and leave Emily alone. Don't talk to her, don't txt her, don't call. Just leave and pretend nothing happened."

Paige stares hard at her. She swears she sees fear somewhere deep in Alison's eyes.  
"I love Emily. And she loves me. No matter how much you want to deny it, you know she loves me too."

Alison's voice is barely audible as she spits out nine cruel words, "No one could ever love a cutting pig skin"

Paige's blood freezes in her veins, those nine words pierce themselves into her heart and she staggers back into the tree. The trunk's the only thing holding her up as she finally lets her gaze drop. Her breathing's uneven as she fights to control herself. _How does she know? I made sure to hide it. The only person that knew was..._

"Alison!"

That voice. The one that pulled her through her darkest times, the one she hadn't heard in weeks.

She looks up and sees Emily walking out from behind a thick tree. She's glaring at Alison, her gaze full of hurt, betrayal and anger.

"Emily...wha...what are you doing here?" Alison stutters as she looks at Emily, her smug smile is gone and in its place is a look Paige has never seen before. She almost looks...scared?

"I saw you walk out here from my window and decided to follow you," Emily turns to look at Paige, her gaze morphing from anger to sadness. Paige can just imagine what she looks like. No less than a puppy that had just been kicked probably. "Paige..I..."

Paige looks away and shuts her eyes, "Did you tell her?"

Emily takes a step towards her, "No, I would never do that."

She waits for Paige to say something, but all Paige can do is take in her words.

She believes her.

After what seems like hours she finally nods and stands.

She won't look at Emily. She's still shocked and angry that Alison knows her darkest secret. But she shouldn't have been so surprised. Alison knew everyone's secret.

"Alison…"

Paige hears Emily call out to the girl that had tormented her. But when they both turn in the direction she had been standing they see she's no longer there.

Paige shakes her head, "She's good at doing that isn't she. She disappears without us even noticing. And just like that shows up again."

"Paige, I'm sorry about what she said. You know it's not true," Emily's voice is full of sadness as she takes a couple steps closer to her.

Paige sighs and glances at Emily before looking away again. She wants to believe her. But her actions these last couple of weeks say otherwise. Still, it wasn't Emily's fault that Alison was….Alison. "Don't apologize for her. She doesn't deserve that. And I know it's not true. But it doesn't make it hurt any less"

Paige feels Emily's warmth as she steps closer to her, she was close enough that she could reach out and grab her hand if she wanted to.

Emily's voice shakes as she speaks quietly, "I tried to call you."

Paige looks up at her in surprise but dips her head before Emily looks too closely at her.  
"Oh. My phone's not really in working condition right now. I don't think it gets service at the bottom of my pool" she mutters sheepishly.

Emily frowns in confusion."What's it doing in your pool?"

Paige blushes as she tucks her hand into her jeans pocket "I sorta... threw it in there"

"Oh" Emily's sounds surprise as she takes in what Paige said.

Paige can feel her gaze burning into her. She clears her throat and shuffles awkwardly, "I came here to talk to you but now I can't remember what I was going to say. Alison…distracted me" Paige notices how her voice changes when she says Alison's name and she hates the effect she has on her, even after two years. It's then that she remembers the talk she had with Emily a while back.  
"I guess when you told me you were letting her go, it really meant you had forgiven her, didn't it?" her voice is full of hurt, and she knows Emily can hear it.

"Paige, I didn't know she'd say those things to you. I thought she had changed. I didn't...I didn't think she was-"

"Was still the same manipulative Alison she had always been?" Paige interrupts, her words edge with anger. She meets Emily's and the hurt in Paige's gaze is too much for Emily to take. She looks down as Paige continues talking.

"I'm sorry I broke your trust Emily. You don't know how much I regret that. But I'm not sorry for not caring about what happens to Alison when all she ever did was torture me and put me through hell."

Emily flinches at her words, and although Paige hates hurting her, she has to get this off her chest. All these feelings she's kept locked inside were finally bursting out. Her anger and hurt making her spill her deepest feelings.

"You weren't the only one whose feeling she played with. If you forgave her for everything she did to you, then lucky her." Paige takes in a ragged breath, "She broke your heart Emily, but she broke me."

Emily looks up at Paige, her eyes are shining with unshed tears, her bottom lip quivering. She can see just how much she meant every word she was saying. It hurts Emily to see Paige like this and her own eyes start watering.

"I'm not going to forgive her for making me hate myself," Paige's voice is breaking but she isn't going to stop, she can't. "For making me hate who I am. It's taken me so long to put myself back together; I'm not going to let her break me again."Paige's tears finally spill down her cheeks and she takes her fist out of her pocket and runs her hands angrily through her hair. Emily reaches out to grab Paige's other hand but Paige pulls it away. "Don't...just, let me calm down, please."

Emily's own tears spill down her cheeks as she watches Paige pace. She crosses her arms over her chest and hugs herself. Her hands ache to reach out and grab Paige. To hold and comfort her. But she knows she doesn't deserve to do that after the way she's behaved towards her. She had been cold and distant to her. All because she was too preoccupied with Alison. She should've known. Alison was never sorry about hurting the people around her.

_Why hadn't I seen it sooner?_

She knew in the back of her mind a small voice had warned her. But she had let Alison's kind words get to her. Just like she always did.


	2. 3,000 Miles Away

**Authors Note:**

Thank you to every single person that reviewed, followed and added as a favorite. You have no idea how much it means to me. I'm still trying to figure all this out so please be patient with this newbie. I'm on a writing rampage so here's a quick update. Thanks again for making my day with your kind words.

* * *

_Emily frowns as she looks _in the direction she figures Alison took. She wanted to believe she had changed. That she was different. But hearing her say those things to Paige...she didn't know what to think.

She looks back at Paige, her heart breaking as she sees her take deep breaths. She doesn't understand what she's feeling. Since she had seen Ali that day in Ravenswood, all the feelings she had for her came flooding back. She had some reservations; she hadn't forgotten everything Ali had done to her, to them. But she had seen how scared she was. How scared she was of whoever had been trying to kill her.  
She felt the need to protect her. To get her back to Rosewood safe. She saw something in Ali's eyes whenever she talked to her. Something that made her believe she could change. She had forgiven her, but she now realized that not everyone Ali had hurt would forgive and forget.

She needed to sort her feelings for Ali and Paige. She felt like her heart was being pulled in two different directions, and she didn't know which one was right. Which one _felt _right. She needed to do that without feeling pressured.

She jumps, startled when she feels a light touch on her arm. She looks at Paige's hand as it rests lightly on her arm, her fingers spreading warmth through her. She shivers involuntarily and Paige reluctantly pulls her hand back. _She thinks I don't want her to touch me, _she scolds herself for hurting Paige once more.

"Sorry" Paige whispers, "You weren't answering."

Emily reaches out and touches her fingers gently against Paige's. "Paige...we need to talk."

Paige dips her head down and looks up at Emily, "I thought that's what we were doing" she says lightly.

Emily's heart aches at Paige's attempt to lighten the mood.

"Emily... the last night I saw you, you said goodbye. I didn't know what that meant. I stayed up all night thinking it over in my head. Did you mean goodbye as in, "goodbye I have to go" or "goodbye, we're done." Paige's voice shakes as she says those last three words. She glances down at Emily's fingers against hers. They're warm and familiar. Tears threaten to blur her gaze but she blinks them away. "I haven't slept well in weeks. I need to know where we stand; I need to know what's going to happen to us."

Her voice is no more than a whisper. Emily can't stand to see how much she's hurting, all because of her. She pulls in Paige to her, wrapping her arms around her shoulders and burying her face in her neck.

Paige responds back automatically. Her arms wrapping against Emily's waist and holding her tight. She buries her face in her hair, her eyes shut tight as she holds her.

After what seems like just seconds, Emily pulls back. She wipes her eyes and stares at Paige. Her eyes are red and puffy from crying, wet trails run down her cheeks. Yet she looks just as beautiful as always. Fresh tears escape Emily's eyes and run down her cheeks at what she's about to say. She doesn't want to hurt Paige, but she doesn't want to lead her on either when she doesn't even know what she's feeling, or what she wants. All she knows is that she still cares about her.  
She takes a deep breath and whispers, "...I think we need to take a break. I, I need to figure things out. I need to...I have to..." She can't figure out what to say. She looks at Paige helplessly and hopes she can understand what she's trying to say.

Paige stays quite, her eyes searching Emily's as she fights the ache in her chest as she feels her heart breaking. She doesn't want to show how much this is hurting her. All she wants to do at that moment is go back in time. Go back to when things between them hadn't been this complicated. She rests her palm against Emily's cheek, her thumb softly stroking her tears away. It's then that she remembers what she had come to talk to her about. She wanted to know where they stood in their relationship before she told her.

She feels like her world is crumbling around her as she looks down. She gathers herself before she meets Emily's gaze. "I came here to talk about us. To sort this...us, out. But I also came to tell you..." She stops and swallows her tears before murmuring, "I'm leaving for California tonight".

Emily's stares at Paige in shock, "What?"

"I'm going to Cali...tonight. I..." Paige stops short as Emily pulls back from her grasp. Her hand lingering were Emily's cheek had been before dropping her arm to her side.

"You're leaving tonight? So you just came to say goodbye?" Emily's voice is defensive.

Paige frowns as she takes a step towards her, "I came here to talk to you. To understand what's happening to us. I didn't want to leave without knowing whether I had a girlfriend in Rosewood or not."

"So what? So you could know if it was okay for you to hook up with other girls in Cali?" Emily's voice came out louder than she had intended.

"No, Emily. Is that really what you think of me?" Paige utters, hurt that Emily would think that of her.

Emily looks away and crosses her arms over her chest. It wasn't what she thought of Paige. But she's confused and scared. _She's leaving._ She thinks miserably. _I'm being left with mushy squash._ She struggles to control herself. _You wanted time to figure things out? Well now you have a lot of fucking time Emily. _She wants to be angry with Paige, but she can't. She's the one that said they needed a break. She's the one that can't figure out what she wants. She's angry at herself.

Paige closes the distance between them, her voice gentle, "I don't want to leave here with you thinking that I'm giving up on you. I'll never give up on you. I just hope one day you can love me as much as I love you. Even if it's 3,000 miles away."

She leans forward and tucks a loose strand of hair behind Emily's ear. She lets her fingers linger against her skin before letting her hand fall down slowly. Her heart aches as she stares at Emily's perfection. Her smooth tan skin. Her dark hair that always manages to look photo-shoot ready. How the sun shines in her eyes, her tears making them glisten. The perfectly full lips that make her weak in the knees. She wants to lean in and press her lips against hers, to let her know that despite everything, she still loves her. But she doesn't want to lean in only to have Emily pull away. She wouldn't be able to handle the rejection. She sighs and instead presses her lips softly against Emily's forehead.

* * *

**Hope it doesn't seem like the chapter was rushed. I just have a lot of ideas in my head and I just go with the flow. Comments? Suggestions? Tell me what you think :) **


	3. Windows Of The Soul

**Authors **Note**:**

Again, I want to thank everyone that reviewed, favorited and followed. It makes me happy to know you guys enjoy reading my story. I'm still surprised by the positive feedback I've received. Hope you enjoy this chapter.

* * *

_The plane flies soundlessly _through the dark sky. Everyone in the plane is asleep, the man next to her snoring so loudly she had finally given up on sleeping and decided to put her earphones on. Even if the man hadn't been snoring, she knew she wouldn't have been able to sleep. She closes her eyes as the soft melody coming from her earphones fills her mind. She tries to concentrate on the beats, the slow keys of the piano, the singer's voice as she pours her heart out in a song for everyone to hear.

_It's so loud inside my head  
With words that I should've said  
As I drown in my regrets,  
I can't take back the words I never said_

She opens her eyes. All she can do is look out the window as tears silently roll down her cheeks, thinking that with every second she was getting farther and farther away from the girl she loves. She stares at the lights from the cities below, her tears blurring her vision and creating a beautiful effect. Yet, as beautiful as the Earth looked from up high, all Paige wanted to do was to gaze into Emily's chocolate brown eyes. To get lost in them and never find her way out.

She rests her head against the window. She can see her reflection staring back at her. She looks like...she wasn't even going to finish that thought. No wonder people had stared at her.

She stands and silently makes her way towards the laboratory. After washing her hands and face, she stares at her reflection in the mirror. Not much better than before, but it'll do. She leans closer and touches her finger tips to the scar on her left eyebrow. She traces it slowly, thinking back to the stormy night she had gotten it. She remembers the hatred she had felt towards herself for hurting Emily. For being a coward.

She pulls her hand back and looks at herself. She can just imagine Emily standing next to her, a brilliant smile on her face as she teased her. She looks away abruptly and reaches for the handle, making her way to her seat as fresh tears stain her shirt. She closes her eyes, Emily's smiling face burned into the back of her eyelids. The last thing on her mind before she finally falls asleep is how long it's been since she's seen Emily smile.

* * *

_The bright moon shines through_ her window and lights her room in a soft glow, her features highlighted as she stares out her window. She's sitting on her window seat; the one Paige had been obsessed with. She smiles warmly as she remembers the first time she saw it_. I've always wanted a room with one of those,_ she had said. The moonlight reflects on her tears as they leave wet trials down her face. She's never felt so alone. Even when she had been trying to help Ali, when she had been practically ignoring Paige, she had known that Paige would always be there for her. That all Emily had to do was go to her, or Paige would come to her. She hadn't realized how selfish she had been. Or was. She pulls her knees against her chest, her arms wrapping around them as she holds herself together, her shoulders shaking as a sob escapes her lips.

"If you keep crying you won't have any tears left" Alison's voice breaks the silence that had settled around Emily.

Emily jumps, startled as she looks over at Ali, "What are you doing here?" She questions as she wipes her tears.

"Isn't it obvious? I came to see you."

Emily watches Ali closely as she makes her way to her bed.

"She never deserved you" Alison states, sure of herself like always.

Emily rests her head against her arm, her gaze moving to the picture frame of Paige and her that sits on her desk. Except that it's not there.  
She stands up quickly, making her way to her desk and looking frantically for it, "Where's my picture?"

Alison sits on the edge of Emily's bed, her voice full of triumph, "I got rid of it"

Emily stares incredulously at her, "You what?"

"I got rid of it. I figured now that Paige is gone you won't need it anymore"

Emily crosses her arms, her voice angry, "How do you know about that?" She opens her eyes in disbelief "Were you listening to us?"

Alison rolls her eyes, "Oh please. I have no interest in what pi...Paige had to say. I saw her putting her suitcases in the trunk of her dad's car. I figured she was leaving."

"You had no right to get rid of that picture. When did you even come into my room?" She can't hide her annoyance at Alison. How dare she invade her privacy? She can just hear what Paige would have said to her. _She's definitely still like that._

"Your mom let me in earlier. Stop being so dramatic Emily," Alison's say with a snide.

"Dramatic? Alison, you insulted Paige earlier. You said awful things to her. I can't believe you would do that." She walks back to the window seat, her back pressed against the cold wall.

"Whatever. She's a big girl, she can deal with it." Alison replies as she walks towards Emily.

Emily doesn't reply. She knows that no matter what she says Alison won't admit it was wrong of her to say those things. She rests her forehead against the cold window. She can feel the cushion of the seat shift as Ali sits down across from her. She feels Ali's fingers rest lightly on her knee. She can feel the warmth from her fingertips through her pajamas.

"You know," Alison starts, "One of the hardest things to do while I was gone was being away from you."

Emily glances at her; Alison's face is half obscured in darkness, her eyes bright under the light of the moon. Emily looks away and gulps quietly. When she looks back, Alison's close to her. Just inches away. Emily can feel her warm breath against her lips, the sweetness of Ali's perfume engulfing her senses.

Ali smiles as she looks down at Emily's lips. She leans closer, her eyes closing as her lips grace Emily's.

"Honey, dinners-"

Emily pulls away from Alison at the sound of her mom's voice. She grimaces as her head bangs against the wall. When she looks back at Ali she sees that she's already making her way to her door. Her mom's standing in the doorway, a surprised look on her face.

"Goodnight Mrs. Fields. I'll talk to you tomorrow Emily."

Emily looks quickly at her mom before speaking, "I want my picture back."

Alison stops and looks back at her, "It's already gone." _Just like Paige_

Emily stares after her as she walks out of her bedroom. Her mom gives her a worried look and walks towards her. She shakes her head and leans her forehead against the window once more, "I don't want to talk about it."

She can tell her mom wants to say more, but she nods silently and walks into the hall, closing the door behind her.

She sighs in relief, glad she won't have to deal with her mom's questions. Questions she won't have the answers to. Her mind's whirling as she stares at the darkness outside of her room. The rain is pounding against the window, the wind shaking the trees wildly, lighting strikes somewhere in the distance, lighting up the dark town. The weather shows perfectly how she's feeling inside. There's a storm raging inside of her. _When will it stop?_ She wanted to be sure of herself. To be sure of what she wanted. Her heart ached for the girl whose heart she had broken and for the girl who had broken hers. She closed her eyes and fell asleep to the pounding of the rain.

* * *

**Disclaimer:**

**The song used does not belong to me. All rights go to Skylar Grey and her label. The song is Words by Skylar Grey.**

P.S I had some trouble with Alison's part of this chapter. I'm still trying to figure out how to "voice" her. Hopefully it wasn't too bad.


	4. New Beginnings, Old Heart Aches

**Authors Note:**

Again thank you all for the support. Each review makes me smile, and puts the pressure on but I can do this…I hope. I hadn't planned on updating tonight but after tonight's episode…well…

* * *

_I knew I should have brought more _sleeveless shirts, she thinks grumpily to herself as she walks out of the airport. She's tired, grumpy and hungry. She squints her eyes as she looks around, letting her bags and suitcases fall to the hot concrete as she lifts her face up to the sun. She smiles as the heat warms her face.

"Emily get back here!"

At the sound of that name, Paige's eyes snap open; she turns around and sees a woman chasing after her daughter, "Emily stop!"

Paige's smile is complete gone. She looks around the busy airport and sighs. This wasn't how it was suppose to be. She was suppose have been there with Emily. They were suppose to have had a road trip, stopping at dinners and eating donuts. They would've spent nights, just the two of them, in the quite car. The radio turned down low, their fingers intertwined as they talked about everything and nothing. They would've made memories. Taken countless pictures of things that would've seemed pointless to other people, but would mean so much to them.

_Get yourself together Paige_, she chastises, _don't break down. Not here_. She takes a deep breath and gathers her bags. She hurriedly makes her way to a taxi that has just pulled up.

"Where to Miss?" the driver asks her as he puts her bags in the trunk.

She takes a deep breath, "Stanford University please."

* * *

_"Emily...Emily wake up. _We're going to be late!"

Emily mumbles out a grumpy response, her muscles feel stiff and sore. She stretches and winces.

"Is she awake? What the hell's she doing on the floor?"

_Hanna_. Of course. She could wake the dead with how loud her voice was.

She opens her eyes to find three sets of eyes staring at her, "What are you guys doing here?" She stifles a yawn as she sits up. She must have fallen off the window seat as she slept. She looks down to see there's a blanket tangled between her legs. _Mom. _She must have covered her in the middle of the night.

She looks up as Hanna clears her throat, "Umm hello? Can you...wow you look like sh-"

"Hanna! Shut up" Aria shoots a glare at her then gazes at Emily with concern, "Em,you okay? You look-"

"Like shit" Hanna pipes in.

"Hanna, seriously?" Spencer rolls her eyes as she helps Emily up.

Hanna pouts as she sits on the window seat, "What? I'm just saying what we're all thinking."

Emily sighs as she looks at the three of them. They all have the same worried expressions. She doesn't know what to tell them first. Ali almost kissing her, the things she said to Paige. Paige leaving. She looks away as she scrunches her eyebrows, she doesn't want to cry and worry them more.

Spencer sits down next to her on the bed, her hand resting on her arm. "Emily..."

"Paige left," she finally mutters. "She left for California yesterday after she came to say goodbye."

Aria joins them on the bed, Emily sandwiched between them as they comfort her, "Oh Emily."

Spencer wraps her arms around her but stays quite.

Emily takes in a ragged breath as she leans her head on Spencer's shoulder. She's lucky to have them. To be able to rely on each other. It's been that way since Alison joined them. They were inseparable. They would always be there when she needed them.

But Paige…

_I had nobody to turn to...I was completely alone.  
_  
She shuts her eyes as Paige's words echo through her head. Images of that night flash through her mind as she tries not to cry. Paige had looked so vulnerable. So broken. Alison had broken her, just like she had said the day before.

She had held her that day as she shook, her tears staining her shirt. She didn't know how long they'd stayed like that. But when they had finally pulled apart, Paige looked like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Keeping her history with Alison a secret had weighed her down. _"After our date at the karaoke bar, when you told me you had been in love with Alison…I didn't know how to tell you. It felt like, I'd be turning you against her. I knew if I told you it would hurt you. And after everything I had done to you, I couldn't stand to hurt you anymore."  
_  
A tap on her knee jerks her out of her thoughts. She blinks back tears and meets Hanna's green eyes, "It'll be okay Em," she tells her sincerely.

She gives her a small smile and rests her hand over Hannah's.

"Are you girls ready? We have to leave soon"

They all turn at the sound of Alison's voice. She smiles at Emily, pretending not to notice her tears as she walks over to them. She knows who she's crying over, and she can't help the annoyance that she feels. She hides it with another smile, "Come on Em. Get dressed, get ready. We're going shopping."

"Shopping? Really?" She looks at the time. It's late in the afternoon.

"Yes, you slept through all our calls and txts. Now hurry, we have a whole day planned ahead of us." Alison winks at her as she walks to the door, "I'll wait for you guys in the car."

Emily stares after her, reluctant to change and get ready. She has to talk to Ali alone. She wasn't even sure what she wanted to say. She hadn't had a chance to really talk to her. The weeks after she had returned had been full of interrogations, camera crews and just plain chaos.

"Come on Em," Aria pleaded. "It'll do you good to come with us. Take your mind off things. Come on. We're not taking no for an answer."

Three set of pleading eyes stare at her.

Emily finally gives in and walks over to her closet. She wills herself to stop thinking about Paige. It won't work for long, she knows that. But she needs to take her mind off the heart ache she feels when she thinks about her. Especially since it's her fault she's feeling that way. She picks out her clothes and turns around to show her friends.

"So? What do you think?"

* * *

**P.S**

I know Emily's parts are longer than Paige's. But do not worry, Paige will get longer parts In the future.


	5. Love Bites

**Authors Note:**

Sorry about the not so quick update. Writers block sucks. But I did write another story, for those of you who are interested in checking it out. It's called "A is for deAth". No pressure tho. So hope you enjoy this chapter.

_Her arms glide through the water_, her legs kicking out behind her as she makes her way to the edge of the pool. She lightly touches her hand against the wall, her head breaking through the surface, water splashing around her as she takes deep breaths. The afternoon sun shines bright, the perfect day for a swim. She smiles as she pulls herself up onto the edge of the pool.

When she swims, she feels free. It's the only time she can let go of all her worries and just be. The pool's her sanctuary. It doesn't judge her. It doesn't care about what she's done, or hasn't done. It doesn't care about the things she's said and the things she regrets saying. It just let's her be.

She pulls her goggles and cap off as she looks at the shimmering water. Light reflects against the ripples on the surface, she kicks her legs and smiles as it creates small waves. 

It was her second day at Stanford. After the taxi dropped her off she spent a little more than an hour looking for the dorms. When she had finally found hers she wanted nothing more than to flop on the bed and sleep, but she had to meet with the swim coach. She talked to him for another hour about the schedules and swimming in general. The school year didn't start for another 3 months, but swim practice started in a week. He told her to spend as much time in the water as she could until then. Everything was going fine until he mentioned Emily. _"Rosewood Sharks huh?" He frowned down at her papers. "There was another swimmer from Rosewood that we were considering. Emily Fields, I think. Did you know her?" Paige nodded her head. "It's a shame what happened to her shoulder. She was an amazing swimmer. We had been planning what kind of scholarship to give her when we heard that she couldn't swim anymore." He sighed as he stood "Well Paige it was great to meet you. Can't wait to see you in action out there." _Paige had smiled politely and left feeling numb. She had tossed and turned all night. _They could have done it. Emily and her could have been together at Stanford._

Paige smiles sadly as she thinks of all the times she spent with Emily in the pool. All the good times, that is. 

She'd always regret the day she tried to scare Emily by holding her underwater. She had been scared of the way Emily was making her feel again. She had tried so hard to bury her feeling for her for so long, that when they had resurfaced she panicked. She had thought of the way Alison had bullied her with threats, manipulation and fear. She made herself believe that if she treated Emily the same way Alison had treated Paige, that she could get Emily to hate her and it would be easier for her not to feel that way about Emily. But of course Emily didn't hate her. She had said so herself when Paige had gone to apologize. Emily was a forgiving person, which was why it hadn't surprised Paige that she had forgiven Alison. Her heart was always in the right place. She always saw the good in people. It was one of the reasons Paige loved her.

Paige smiles as she threads her foot over the water, her thoughts on all the times she had spent with Emily. All the kisses they had shared. The comfort they found in each other.

"You know, if you keep smiling to yourself like that, people are going to think you're crazy."

A teasing voice breaks her thoughts and she looks up to see a Latina girl standing over her.  
Her light brown hair falls down past her shoulders, the tips of them dyed a light blue, almost the same color of the pool. Her bangs, which almost cover her hazel eyes, are swept to the side, Her eyes shine bright as the water reflects on them. The black and green one piece she's wearing compliments her tan skin. Paige blushes as she runs her gaze over her toned body without noticing. She clears her throat awkwardly, "umm, what?"

The girl laughs. She has the kind of laugh that makes you want to laugh along, loud and full of joy. She sits next to Paige, her feet sinking into the water.

"I said, that if you keep smiling to yourself people will think you're crazy. Well...if you keep smiling, then frowning, then smiling again." The girl smiles as she looks at Paige.

Paige stares at her, a frown creasing her eyebrows. The girl's smile falters and she brushes her bangs to the side. Paige realizes she must be freaking the girl out. She dips her head down and chuckles quietly, "Sorry, umm I was...thinking."

The girls smile returns, the corners of her eyes crinkling as she smiles widely, there's a dimple on her left cheek. Paige can sense her studying her. "Rosewood sharks huh?" She asks, pointing to the logo on Paige's swimsuit. Since she won't get her Stanford suits until next week she has to swim in her old ones.

Paige runs her finger over the logo, "Yeah, Go Sharks!" she pumps her fist in the air, quickly blushing as she realizes how dorky that was. "It's my high school, back in Pennsylvania."

The girl keeps studying her, a thoughtful look on her face, "Pennsylvania huh? That's far away." She bites her lip before continuing, "What are you getting away from?"

Paige gapes at her, "What? What makes you think I'm getting away from anything?" she asks defensively, the girl's question making her uncomfortable. That's exactly what she's doing, getting away.

_She wishes she could have gotten away with Emily_.

The girl holds her hands up defensively, "Woah there Sharky, I didn't mean to get too personal."

Paige's defensive stare turns to one of confusion as she frowns at the girl, "Did you just call me Sharky?"

Paige watches with amusement as the girl blushes and scratches the back of her neck, "Well…I mean…I don't…"

Paige chuckles as she shakes her head. The girl grins and extends her hand toward her, "I'm Violet."

Paige takes her hand in hers. It's warm and soft, her fingers calloused, her grip steady. Paige shakes it, "Paige."

They hold hands awkwardly for a moment, Paige letting go as she lets out a nervous laugh.

Violet chuckles and slides closer to the pools edge, "So Sharky...how about a little swim?"

Paige shields her face with her hands as Violet jumps into the pool, water splashing her as she laughs.

She swims backwards, her eyebrow raised as she taunts Paige.

Violets hair is floating around her, the blue tips invisible as they blend with the pool. There's a mischievous glint in her eyes. Paige stares at the strange girl. She can't explain it but she feels like she can trust her. She shakes her head and finally gives in. With a laugh, she dives into the cool water.

_Alison's soft lips press against hers, _her hand on her thigh as Emily closes her eyes, her hand on Ali's cheek as she parts her lips slightly. They were in her car, parked outside of Ali's house. It was late at night, the streets empty. They had just dropped off the other girls, all of them tired from the long shopping trip to the city. When Emily had stopped in front of Ali's house, she had intended on talking to her. About everything, especially about the way she had treated Paige. But when Emily had turned to face her, Ali's lips had met hers. It reminded her startling of the first time Paige had kissed her.

Emily shuts her eyes and keeps kissing Ali, willing herself to stop thinking about Paige. She tries to concentrate on Ali's perfume; it's sweet and smells like lilac. Unlike Paige's. Paige's spicy scent mixed with a hint of chlorine that always clung to her from hours at the pool, a smell she loved, always left Emily craving for more.

_Damn it Emily, stop thinking about her. _

She didn't know how long they stayed like that. The kiss was nice, Ali's lips soft and full. But it was nothing like the kisses she had shared with Paige. She couldn't help but compare them, something she hated doing. When she kissed Paige, it left her breathless. Paige tried to show how much she loved her with every stroke of her lips. Emily's skin felt like it was set on fire wherever Paige touched her. Paige would always lean in for more, like she couldn't get enough of her, her lips had been demanding but not controlling, like Ali's.

Emily pulls away, panting as she opens her eyes and looks at Ali. Ali looks back at her, and Emily notices the blush on her cheeks. Ali smiles and sits back against the seat, her hand lingering on her thigh.

"That was…" Ali starts, but she doesn't seem to be able to come up with words.

Emily gives her a small smile, her voice quiet, "Yeah." She glances at Ali's hand; her fingers are tracing small patterns on her thigh.

"Listen Ali, we need to talk." Emily looks at Ali, her relaxed stance against the seat in now tense. "The other day, the things you said to Paige-"

"Can we not talk about her?" Ali interrupts and Emily frowns. "Look I get that she was your…girlfriend, But that doesn't mean I have to like her. I can't stand the thought of you being with her, that's why I said those things."

Emily pulls her leg back, Ali's hand sliding off her thigh with the movement, "You bullied her before I even met her," Emily's tone is angry.

Alison looks at her surprised, "She told you I bullied her? Did she say how?"

Emily looks at her confused as she examines Ali's face. "No. She just said you were relentless."

Alison reaches for the door handle, her gaze lingering on Emily's face. "I have to go." She frowns as she walks toward her house. _She doesn't know. Paige didn't tell her about the letter. _

Emily calls out to her from her car, "Alison wait." But Alison ignores her and steps into her house, closing the door behind her. Emily takes a deep breath and starts her car, her mind whirling as she makes her way home.

**Like it, hate it? Let me know. Paily shippers, hang in there. **


	6. Violets Are Blue

**Authors Note:**

So sorry about not updating for a while, I've been sick and haven't felt up to writing. I plan on updating again either tomorrow or Sunday. I will also update my other story, hopefully. I'll try. So hope you like this chapter and please review, I love reading what you guys think.

_The dim room is silent as Paige_ lies on her bare bed. Her back pressed against the cool mattress as she looks around at the spare furniture surrounding her. A wooden desk is pushed against the corner of the room, an identical one on the corner across from it. The beds are separated by a nightstand, the window across from them. She stares at the bed beside hers,

_"Truth, what would you change?"_

_"Well, I'd push the beds a little closer together."_

She sighs as she turns her gaze towards the window. The view is stunning, the setting sun barely visible as it sets behind a tall building, the orangey-pink sky darkening as the sun fades. Laughter echoes from the halls and she rubs her eyes impatiently; she's stuck in her dorm feeling sorry for herself while everyone else is probably on their way out and hanging with friends.

Even if she wanted to go out, she didn't know anyone, let alone the city. Her roommate wouldn't be there until who knows when, and she didn't want to risk getting lost even if it was still early. Her only friend at Stanford was Violet.

After they had swum for the majority of the afternoon, she had learned quite a bit about the strange girl. She wasn't on the swim team but she liked the water. She was a sophomore on the soccer team, a striker; she had gotten a full ride to Stanford just like Paige. Both her parents were Mexican, but she figured her great grandparents had been of another race, hence her hazel eyes and light but tan skin tone. She had counted off things she liked to do on her fingers; sleep, eat, workout, eat some more, sleep.

Paige had joked that if that was all she did she probably didn't have much of a social life. But now it was her that was stuck in her room with nothing to do and no one to talk to. Her social life wasn't much better. They would have exchanged numbers if her phone wasn't still at the bottom of her pool, unless her dad had taken it out. Or more likely, had paid someone to take it out for him. Not like it would do her much good now. She'll have to buy another one, and soon.

As she thinks about her phone at the bottom of the pool, she hears a light knock on the door. Confused, she sits up slightly and leans back on her arms, a frown on her face as she listens closely, waiting for another knock she probably imagined. Another knock, this one louder and followed by two more, echoes through her silent and now dark room. Her frown deepens as she stands and makes her way to the door. She opens it and raises her eyebrow, "Violet, hey."

Violet smiles sheepishly, "Hey Sharky, you in the mood for hanging out?" She's wearing faded blue skinny jeans and a light green v neck shirt, the light reflecting off it makes her hazel eyes seem green.

Paige tilts her head to the side, confused "Not to be rude or anything but...how did you know this was my dorm?"

"Oh well, I asked around, knocked on a couple dozen doors. You know, no biggie." Her smile is shy, the blue tips of her bangs cover her eye.

She stares at her and Violets hazel eyes meet hers, she looks away, "But, no one knows me here. How did they know who you were talking about?"

"I'm just that good at describing people." Violet states confidently. She watches as Violets eyes roam down her body, her eyebrow rising. "Nice Batman shirt…and boxers." She blushes as she looks down at herself. After she had returned from the pool she had showered and changed into comfortable clothes, hence the plain black t-shirt with the Batman logo and red and black boxers.

She chuckles and leans her shoulder against the door frame, her arms crossed across her chest, a smirk on her lips, "And how exactly did you describe me?" She notices Violet swallows as she stares at her, her eyes darker than before, and wonders what that's all about.

"Ummm, you know. Tallish, female, beautiful and walks around with a frown." She smirks as she leans toward Paige, "Have you always frowned this much?"

_Did she just call me beautiful?_

She realizes she's frowning and quickly smoothes her expression, a small smile appearing instead, "Not, not always." She sighs as Violet raises her eyebrow, obviously expecting a better explanation, "I worry a lot…about someone."

"Oh, gotcha. Let me guess, girlfriend back home?" Violet's tone is light, but an expression she can't quite understand flashes across her face, she almost looks upset. The expression is gone almost as fast as it appears, replaced by a look of concern when she dips her head and sighs. She definitely doesn't want to talk about that, but when she looks back at Violet she sees sincerity in her eyes. For a reason she can't understand she feels like she can trust her. She has only known Violet less than a day, yet she knows she can talk to her about anything. She wants to talk to her. Maybe she just needs someone that will listen.

She clears her throat, "Ex-girlfriend, actually. It's...complicated."

She feels Violet's hand on her arm, "I can handle complicated." Violet answers, squeezing her arm gently. "How about you invite me into your Batcave and we can talk about it," Paige frowns again and blushes when Violet chuckles. "See? There's that frown again." She points behind her, "Your Batcave AKA your room. Cause it's so dark…" she raises her eyebrow, "and because something tells me you can kick major ass."

She glances behind her and notices her room is pitch black, the sun long gone. She blushes again as she realizes she didn't even think about inviting Violet in; they had been in the hall the whole time.

She dips her head and chuckles, "How about you give me a tour of the city instead?" She glances down at her clothes. "I'll just change really quick." She steps back into her room, smiling at Violet as she walks toward her luggage.

"But those boxers and batman shirt look super cute on you" Violet teases as she waits by the door.

She laughs as she pulls on a pair of jeans, "Shut up." She smiles as she hears Violet laugh. She grabs her jacket and keys, her night looking better than twenty minutes ago as she walks into the hallway with Violet and locks her door. Her room is on the second floor so they decide to take the stairs. Once they reach the lobby, she holds the door open for Violet, the older girl smiling her thanks as she tucks a strand of blue hair behind her ear.

Paige pulls on her jacket as she smiles back at Violet, "Where to?"

**PS**

Am I doing Paige justice or is she missing something? Does she need to be funnier? Flirtier? Let me know what you think.


	7. Fight For Love

**A/N: Hope you guys still like this story. I'm going to be honest, I had initially planned on making this a one shot, but the positive reviews made me want to keep it going, so I had no idea where to take this story. I'm slowly figuring it out so I hope you guys stick with me. **

* * *

_Paige's arms wrap around her_, _her palms pressed against the small of her back, pulling her closer. Their bodies merge together, no space left between them as their lips meet hungrily. Her hands roam along Paige's biceps, up her defined shoulders and into her hair. She tangles her fingers in Paige's hair and tilts her head to deepen the kiss. Paige's kisses send shivers up her spine; she can't help but get lost in her arms as the desire and need overtake them. Paige's fingers slowly slip under her shirt and trace across her smooth skin, her fingertips leaving trials across her hip. She opens her eyes to meet Paige's darkened gaze. They're filled with lust and love. So much love. Paige smiles at her._

Emily wakes with a start, her heart pounding as she sits in her bed, a light sheen of sweat covering her. She runs her fingers through her hair as she looks around her dark and empty room.

It was just a dream.

She kicks the covers off her impatiently, swinging her feet over the edge of her bed. She walks over to her window seat and plops down on it. Her heart's still pounding as she closes her eyes in frustration. It had felt so real. For just a moment her heart wasn't a confused mess and she had Paige in her arms and everything was perfect. But then reality had come crashing down and she was left with an empty heart.

Her heart yearns for Paige. Even unconsciously she craves for her. She sighs as she grabs her phone and dials Paige's number, forgetting her phone doesn't work. Her heart's still racing as she listens to the hollow rings. There's a click and suddenly it's Paige's voice she hears, "Hey it's Paige, I'm probably in swim practice or out running but I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Bye"  
She closes her eyes as she ends the call, an empty feeling settling in her heart.

"Please get back to me soon".

She opens her eyes and frowns. Her stomach drops as she realizes it's not up to Paige to fix this.

It's up to her.

She's know it all along, but her thoughts had always been clouded by Alison. She sighs as she crawls back into bed, her dream still vivid in her mind. She misses Paige's warmth. The light inside of her that always shone with optimism and happiness. Emily needed that light to brighten her dark days. Paige was the only one that made her feel safe. Paige felt like home. But now she's in California and she's stuck in Rosewood.

She frowns as she closes her eyes.

_Am I though?_

With A gone she doesn't have to worry anymore. Doesn't have to watch her back constantly, or fear for her loved ones. She can live a normal life now.

But not without Paige. She needs her sexy grin and adorable head dip that makes her heart skip a beat. The way she would catch Paige looking at her when she thought she wasn't looking. She needs her, all of her. Emily smiles as she thinks about her. She'd fix things between them. Somehow. She'd find a way.  
Her mind drifts into endless thoughts of Paige, her breathing evens and she slowly falls asleep.

* * *

_The nauseating churn in her stomach_ becomes impossible to ignore as she rolls onto her side, a muffled cry passing her lips as she slips from the comfy surface she was laying on and lands face first onto the cold hard ground. The pounding in her head makes it nearly impossible for Paige to open her eyes, as soon as she does she instantly shuts them as the bright light makes the pounding worse.

_Note to self: drowning your feelings in alcohol, bad idea._

She groans as vile threatens to make its way up her throat. It takes energy she doesn't have to keep the contents of her stomach well in her stomach.

Drinking the night before with Violet had seemed like a good idea at the time. Now she was reevaluating the whole thing.

_This is definitely the last time I drink...that much._

After Violet had shown her around campus and the area around the university they had decided to go back to Violets dorm to talk. It had taken a couple shots of tequila to encourage her and give her the nerve to talk to Violet about her past. Once the shots had done their job, she couldn't stop.

She had spilled her heart out to Violet who had listened closely, her eyebrows furrowed as she listened intently to Paige's past. It amazed her how much Paige had been through, and how much she loved Emily. The girl sitting in front of her was stronger than a lot of the people she knew, despite the tears that now streaked her cheeks.

But crying wasn't a sign of weakness. Not to Violet at least. It took a lot of bravery to let your walls down around someone (even if it was somewhat induced by alcohol) you had just met.

Violet wasn't sure she wanted to hear about Emily, especially considering the fact that she had come to like Paige in more than a friendly way. Paige was probably the sweetest and most caring girl she had met. It didn't hurt that she was incredibly attractive and had an outrageous sense of humor.

After hearing her talk about Emily the way she did, she didn't think Paige was in any condition to start a new relationship, let alone with someone she barely knew. It seemed like what Paige needed was a friend, and that's what Violet would be. A friend.

Paige groans as she clutches her stomach, "I'm never drinking with Violet again." She rolls onto her back as she hears a soft chuckle. She cracks an eye open, wincing as the pounding in her head worsens.  
Violet's standing in the doorway, holding the door open with one hand while the other clutches a cold bottle of water.

"Is that a promise or a threat?" She smirks, walking over to Paige and handing her the bottle along with a pill for the headache.

Paige mutters her thanks as she slowly sits up, her back pressed against the soft bed. She swallows the pills with a chug of water and glares at Violet when she smirks, "Are you always this grumpy when you're hungover?"

"Isn't everyone?" Paige snaps back, instantly regretting it. It's not Violet's fault she drank so much. She expects Violet to get angry at her for raising her voice but Violet just chuckles and flops down on the bed, her arms resting on her stomach.

Paige can't help but glance down Violets body. She's wearing a skin tight tank top, the material hugging the curves of the tan girl in just the right places, a pair of denim shorts compliment her long and toned legs, her look's completed by black canvas shoes and a loose ponytail.

"I wouldn't know. I'm not much of a drinker." She glances down at Paige, whose eyebrows are furrowed in confusion.

"Then whose bottle of tequila was that?" She points to the bottle that's tipped over on Violet's desk.

Violet shrugs her slim shoulders, "My roommates'. She's not this grouchy when she's hungover tho." She smirks.

Paige rolls her eyes and glances down at herself. She's in her boxers and batman t-shirt again. Heat rushes to her cheeks when she notices Violet staring at her with her eyebrow raised. She avoids meeting her gaze as she looks around the room for her jeans. She notices the difference between Violet's side of the dorm and her roommates more clearly than she had last night.

While her roommate's wall was covered in posters of the "hottest celebs", Violet's was covered in posters of different bands, video games and hand drawn portraits. A light brown guitar's propped against the foot of the bed and a small bookshelf is overflowing with books.

She nods her head towards the guitar as she finally meets Violets hazel eyes, "How long have you played?" Violet bites her lip and narrows her eyes as she thinks. A gust of wind drifts through the window and blows strands of blue hair across her face which she distractedly brushes back, causing Paige to smile.

"Umm, well I started when I was 11, so 8 years." She nods her head, as if confirming to herself what she just said. Another smile breaks across Paige's face and she glances at Violets hand. Her fingers had felt calloused when they had shook hands the first time they meet. Now she knew why.  
Her smile faltered as she thought about Emily's hands.

When they first started unofficially seeing each other, before Paige had come out, Emily's hands had been soft. Her fingers had curled loosely between hers. But as time went by they had become more calloused, especially after Emily had returned from Haiti, and they held onto Paige tightly whenever they held hands, almost as if she were afraid that if she let go just a bit something bad would happen. The daily fight against A had taken more than just an emotional toll on her, her shoulder was clear evidence of that.

"Paige."

She missed the warmth that spread through her body when she was anywhere near Emily, or just thinking about her for that matter. Emily made her feel safe; she was her anchor, the only thing that had kept her sane and hopeful through so many stormy nights and cloudy days.

"Paige."

She shakes her head as Violets voice drags her back to reality. She dips her head and glances at her, looking away quickly.

Violets leaning up on her elbow, her hazel eyes gazing worriedly at her, "Thinking about Emily?"

She nods and takes a deep breath, silently commanding the tears that threaten to blur her vision to go away. Enough tears had been shed the night before, she's sure if it. Her eyes feel puffy and dry. Violets tan leg brushes her as sits on the ground next to her.

"Have you thought about going back to Rosewood? Just to fight for her one last time?" Violet asks, her shoulder bumping lightly against Paige's. Violet hated seeing Paige hurt, especially after the heart breaking way Paige's voice would crack every time she mentioned Emily the night before.

"Every day since I got here. That's all I've been thinking about." Her voice shakes. She pulls her knees into her, her arms wrapping protectively over them as she hugs her knees to her chest. "But…you can't fight for someone that doesn't want to be fought for."

Violet bites her lip as she glances at Paige's profile. "Maybe it's your turn to be fought for." Whether she's referring to herself or Emily, Violet isn't sure. All she knows is that Paige is the kind of girl that deserved fighting for. If Emily was dumb enough then so be it, but Paige needed to know she deserved to be loved the same way she loved Emily.

Paige meets Violets eyes. She studies Violets heart shaped face and a small smile pulls at her lips. She couldn't be more thankful that she had found a friend like her at Stanford. "Thanks for being here."

Violet blushes as she rests her hand against Paige's arm, she doesn't know how long she'll be able to just be Paige's friend. "Anytime."

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**Reviews?**


	8. Golden Ticket

**A/N: A quick update, sorta. Thank you all so much for the reviews, you don't know how much that makes me smile. **  
**Hopefully you enjoy this chapter.**

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_The kitchen is quite as Emily_ sits on a stool; her elbows leaning against the marble counter as she scrolls through her phone, picture after picture of her and Paige fill the screen.

The girls are sitting around Spencer's kitchen attempting to eat breakfast. Alison was gone for the day so that left the four girls. There was a calm serenity they hadn't felt since her return, the air always seemed tense when Alison was around. It was like she wanted things to go back to the way they were, but the girls weren't going to let that happen. Specially Spencer.

Spencer walks behind Emily and sighs as she catches a glimpse of a picture of Emily and Paige at a swim meet. The girls are wearing identical smiles of happiness as they hold their medals in front of them and while Emily is looking at the camera, Paige's focus is entirely on Emily.

"Going through old photos isn't going to bring her back to Rosewoods Em." Spencer's gentle voice drags her out of her thoughts, "and your omelet's getting cold."

She glances at Spencer and shrugs before focusing her attention on the phone again.

Hanna bites her lip as she grabs a cookie off her plate, "You wouldn't be sitting here all miserable if you hadn't broken up with her."

"Hanna" Aria shoots her a warning look, begging her to keep her mouth shut. She knows how confused Emily is, Hanna doesn't need to make it worse.

"What?" Hanna says defensively, "You all know it's true"

"Just shut up" Spencer orders as she sits beside her and glares at her over her steaming cup of coffee.

"I mean, it's obvious you still love Paige. You're just torturing yourself by staying here." Hanna looks sadly at her, "Em, we just want you to be happy. And you were…when you were with Paige."

"You're right Hanna. I made a huge mistake in letting her go." The girls look at her in surprise as she sets her phone down on the counter. Hanna's triumph expression at being told she's right makes her smile.

Aria leans on her hand as she studies Emily, "Then why are you still here?"

Emily bites her lip as she looks at her hands. How does she explain to them everything she's feeling? It's hard enough for her to get her thoughts in order, but having to say them out loud would be nearly impossible. She traces her finger across the screen on her phone, trying to figure out how to phrase her answer.

"You want to know what I think?" Hanna asks as she takes a bite of her cookie.

"No!" Spencer and Aria retort in unison.

Hanna rolls her eyes in annoyance. She points at Emily with the remainder of her cookie, crumbs falling on the counter, "I think the reason Emily's still here instead of getting her ass on a plane to Cali and begging Paige to take her back is because she's scared of Alison"

Emily tenses when she feels the three girls staring at her.

"Are you, Emily?" Aria asks, "Scared of Alison?"

She shifts uncomfortably in her seat, the unwanted attention making her blush. "No," she huffs. "I'm not scared of Alison. I just, don't want to hurt her."

"But you're hurting Paige." Hanna points out, not holding back like usual.

She looks out the window as she crossed her arms across her chest, "I guess I'm just scared that Paige is done with me." It hadn't even been a week since she had left and already she was doubting her. But with the way she had treated Paige the last couple of weeks, she had reason to. Paige had shown her time after time how much she loved her, and that she would always be there for her. All she had done was push her away, keep things from her, and continually lie. Paige deserved better.

Hanna shakes her head with a chuckle, causing Emily to turn and glare at her. "Emily, Paige couldn't stop loving you even if she tried."

She opens her mouth to protest but Hanna lifts her finger and presses it against her lips, silencing her. "And stop trying to convince yourself that you don't deserve Paige. Because you do."

She frowns at Hanna; her voice is muffled behind her finger, "How did you kno-"

"Oh please, it's written all over your face" Hanna says back, the tone of her voice suggesting it should be obvious.

She rolls her eyes and leans her head back, smacking Hanna's finger away. A smile pulls at her lips as Hanna holds it to her chest, feign to be hurt. Spencer stands and walks towards the living room stairs, glancing at Emily as she makes her way to her room. They watch with confusion as Spencer ascends up the stairs. She returns minutes later with a blue piece of clothing in her arms."As much as I hate to admit it, because you already did it once… But Hanna's right."

Aria shakes her head in amusement as Hanna grins.

"Paige couldn't stop loving you even if she tried." She hands Emily the blue fabric which she takes carefully.

Her eyes widen as she unfolds Paige's jacket. "How...where did you get this?" She asks in confusion. She runs her fingers over the Rosewood Sharks emblem.

"She came over before she left, after she had talked to you. She told me to give this to you if you missed her." Spencer smiles softly at her, "She's only been gone for a couple days Emily. She won't be done with you for a long time."

She's speechless as she runs her finger over Paige's jacket. It's the one she used whenever she was done practicing at the school pool. It still smells like her. It takes everything in her to stop herself from burying her face in the soft jacket and engulf herself in that intoxicating scent that is Paige's.

She clears her throat and slides on the jacket, a shiver running through her. This is the closest she's felt to Paige since she had left.

But this isn't enough.

She doesn't want to feel the warm jacket against her skin when it could be Paige's warm body instead. She doesn't want to bury her face into the jackets collar when she could instead bury it against Paige's neck.

Spencer must notice her determined expression because she pulls something from her jeans back pocket, "Here."

She takes it, her jaw dropping as she realizes what it is. She looks at Spencer's radiant expression, "Where did you get this?" Hanna and Aria crowd around her and grin at each other.

"Paige also gave it to me."

She runs her finger over the plane ticket. A plane ticket to California. The purchase date indicates that Paige bought it two weeks ago, when things between them had still been shaky. The departure date on the ticket is empty, available for any day she chooses. Tears blur her vision as the significance of this hits her.

Spencer's warm hand rests on her shoulder, her voice soft as she looks at her. "Paige never lost hope."

* * *

_Her arms wrap around her dad's_ shoulder as he hugs her tightly. His strong cologne surrounds her, it's not often she smells it this close. She pulls away and smiles up at her dad, "Sorry I kept you waiting."

She had been in Violets dorm, listening to her play the guitar, when a knock had interrupted them. Violet had opened the door to find her friend who was looking for "that McCullers girl you kept blabbering about". Apparently her dad was asking around for Paige after nobody had been at her dorm. Violet had blushed and glared at her friend as Paige had hurriedly splashed water on her face and pulled her jeans on. She waved goodbye to both Violet and the mystery friend, who had stared at Violet with a mischievous grin and raised eyebrow.

"I was worried about you. Where were you?" He demands.

She dips her head and tucks her hands into the back pockets of her jeans. She knew he'd be worried that she hadn't been in her dorm. The only reason he had let her leave Rosewoods without a phone was because he'd be coming to a meeting in California and he'd use the opportunity to check up on her.

"Sorry dad," she mutters sheepishly. She really doesn't want to tell him where she was but she has no other choice. "I...slept over at a friend's room."

"Slept over as in, slept over or _slept _ov-." Heat rushes to her face as she quickly talks over him before he can finish that thought.

"No, no. She's just a friend. Nothing happened." He stares at her incredulously and she lets out an exasperated sigh. "Dad, I swear."

He finally nods and smiles at her, "It seems you're doing fine if you already found a friend."

"Well technically she found me but yeah, things are better than I expected." She smiles as she thinks of Violet, chuckling in embarrassment when she notices her dad staring at her with an amused expression.

"Here. The numbers the same" He hands her a slim rectangle, smaller than his hand. She takes it and smiles as she turns the phone over in her hands. "So you can keep in touch with your _friend_." She dips her head at the way he says friend. "And with me of course. I need to be able to check up on you." He reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out something small and shiny. She frowns as she looks at her dad in confusion. "What's that?"

He nods his head to his left, where a brand new car shines under the sun, "Late graduation present."

He tosses the keys to her, which she barely manages to catch as she stares opened mouthed at the black Camaro staring back at her, she hadn't even noticed it until now.

"But...what about my Prius?" She walks over the Camaro and runs her fingers lightly over the hot smooth surface.

"It's still in Rosewood. I figured it'd be better for you to have a car here and a car in Rosewoods for when you visit. Do you like it?" He joins her as she stands next to the muscle car.

"I love it. It's definitely different than the Prius. Gonna take some getting use to." She clicks the unlock button on the key and her heart races as the car beeps.

"How about you start practicing now?" He heads towards the passenger, "Let's go get dinner and you can tell me more about this _friend_ of yours." He winks at her as he opens the door and climbs in.

Paige chuckles as she rolls her eyes. She opens her door and climbs in, strapping the seat belt across her chest. She wiggles a bit in the seat as she runs her hands over the steering wheel. The car has that trademark new car smell, the one that she can't wait to get rid of. It'll be gone when she starts swim practice and she puts her chlorine smelling gym bag in the back seat. That's when the car will feel like it's hers.

She starts the engine and a grin pulls at her lips as it roars to life. She can feel the cars power under her hands as the steering wheel vibrates. She can definitely get used to this. She looks over at her dad and notices he's grinning as well. She pulls out of the parking lot, the car driving smoothly out of the University. She remembers a Mexican restaurant Violet had pointed out as she had shown her around last night.

"Her name's Violet." Her dad turns to her in confusion. She glances at him and smiles, "My friend. Her name's Violet."

He nods in understanding, a small smile on his 's glad Paige found someone that makes her smile this much. He didn't know how much longer he could handle seeing his daughter hurt over Emily Fields. He knew Emily was a kind girl, and that they both loved each other. But from what her could see, Emily hadn't been a very good girlfriend to Paige for a while. There had been days when Paige's smile would radiate brighter than the sun, and other times when it was difficult for her to even fake one. He shakes his head as he turns the radio on, he was going to focus on the present. And that present involved a happy Paige. "It's a pretty name," He replies.

She smiles again as a soft melody fills the car.

_That's not the only pretty thing about her._

* * *

**For those of you wanting some angst, don't worry, it's coming up soon :P  
**

**Reviews please? Let me know what you think.**


	9. Let Me Go

**A/N:**_ Hey guys! Sorry about the long wait (as if any of you had been waiting) but I needed to plan things out before I continued writing. I've been submerging myself in reading other Paily fanfic, which both inspires (because damn there's alot of **really** talented writers out there) and holds me back (because my fics aren't as good as those) but anyway, no pity party (if you're still reading this A/N; Thank you) S_o Hope you enjoy, and like always thanks to everyone that's reviewed, followed, and favorited my fanfic. _  
_

* * *

"_California_? Emily what-" she grabs her daughters arm, pulling her to a stop in the middle of her room, "What do you mean you're going to California?" She had spent the last 10 minutes trying to grab Emily's attention while she had hurried around her room grabbing this and that from drawers and her closet; it was starting to make her dizzy.

Emily sighs irritably as she pulls her arm out of her moms grasp, there was too much energy coursing through her to stand still. "I'm going to California, to get Paige back." She swiftly moves out of her moms grasp when she reaches out for her again and makes her way to her bed were a medium sized suitcase overflows with her clothes. She wasn't even sure what she was packing, her body had been working on auto pilot since she left Spencer's house.

"_To get Paige back?"_ Her mom asks in disbelief causing her to sigh again, she really doesn't want to explain herself, but her mom won't leave her alone unless she does. "Emily, Paige is going to _college_ in California. You can't just drag her back to Rosewood-"

She gives in, deciding that explaining to her mom things quickly will get her off her back sooner. "I'm not dragging her anywhere mom. I'm just.." The damn zipper on her suitcase gets stuck as she tries to close it, "..going to..." She mutters through clenched teeth as she struggles to get it unstuck, "ugh!" She pushes the suitcase away in frustration and plops down on her bed as her mom walks over and takes a seat beside her.

"Emily, sweetheart-" the calming tone of her mom's voice suggest she's about to try to reason with her.

"Mom you're not going to change my mind."

"I'm not trying to change it. I just want to understand why you're suddenly in a hurry to go to California." She frowns as she glances at the plane ticket on the nightstand, "When did you even buy a plane ticket?"

"Paige left it with Spencer before she left." She finally meets her mother's eyes, "She bought it two weeks ago. Mom I made a huge mistake letting her go."

"And you're going there to..get her back?" Emily glances away as she realizes how ridiculous it sounds, like Paige is just property she has to reclaim. But that's not how she intends it to sound. If Paige still wants to be with her, it's up to Emily to go and fix things. Maybe get her back was the wrong way to word it, she had to go _win_ Paige back. Except she associated winning with competition, and she didn't want to think about anyone else being interested in Paige.

She shakes her head to clear that thought away. She didn't need to start second guessing herself again. "Yes. Mom, Hanna and Spencer are coming with me. We'll be fine."

"What about Aria?"

The short brunette had politely declined when they had decided to all go to California. Ezra was still healing from the gun shoot wound, courtesy of their dear friend A. Aria wanted to stay and make sure he was healing properly. Despite their strained relationship, they were trying to work things out. While the rest of them were weary of Ezra, Aria was trying to forgive him and understand his side of things better. Just thinking about Ezra watching them constantly, literally 24/7, still sent a chill down her spine. "She's staying here to take care of Ezra."

"And Alison?" Pam asks wearily. It still felt strange asking about someone that had been dead a few weeks ago. Whenever she would see Alison it was like she was in another world. She'd seen her daughter cry over the young blonde years ago; yet she had stood on her porch and talked to her just days earlier.

"Mom she can barely leave Rosewood let alone travel to another state." She stands as she tries to close her suitcase again, intentionally avoiding her mom's eyes; she can feel her staring at her.

"Speaking of Alison...what was about to happen the other night?"

There it was, the question she was dreading. She knew it was only a matter of time before her mom broached that subject again. She had been trying to think of an answer to that question that wouldn't lead to more questions from her mother for the past 4 days, but she hadn't been able to come up with anything. "Mom I don't want to talk about that."

"Emily..." Her mom's stare feels like it's burning into her. She shifts uncomfortable before defeatedly looking at her.

"She almost kissed me. The next day she did...repeatedly, and I kissed her back." If she had expected to see judgment in her mom's eyes, she's proved wrong. There's nothing but slight confusion in the woman's gaze.

"But now you're trying to get Paige back?"

Emily sighs in relief as she finally manages to zip the suitcase close. She sits next to her mom again, meeting her gaze determinedly, "I realized that Paige is who I want to be with." Her gaze drops once again, "I don't know if she'll even want to talk to me."

"Of course she will. That girl loves you more than I'd like to admit." Her mom says with a warm and fond smile.

"I love her too. I just hope she gives me a second chance to show her." The fact that people were so sure about Paige's love for her reassures and bothers her. If everyone can see just how much Paige loves her, they would most likely see how much Emily had hurt her. It bothers her that everyone assumes she deserves Paige's love even after everything she had done and said to her. Paige deserves someone that didn't take that love for granted. She hated being the cause of Paige's pain, of her heartbreak. But she was more than willing to fix it, if Paige gave her the chance.

"What happens if she takes you back? Are you going to come back here and have a long distance relationship with her? Or are you-"

She hurriedly stops her mom before she makes her over think things, "Mom I haven't thought that far yet."

"Alright, fair enough. First thing first; you need to clear things up with Alison." The warm supporting hand her mom places on her shoulder does little to calm her as she think about confronting Alison. "You both need to move on from, whatever was going on with you two." She smiles warmly at her daughter before giving her shoulder a squeeze. She gets up to leave, stopping in the doorway as she turns and meets Emily's worried gaze. "The sooner you get it over with the better."

She doesn't miss the sigh that escapes Emily's lips as she walks away. She sighs as well, relief making her shoulders relax.

She had been worried since she walked in on Emily and Alison's almost kiss. Alison had never been her favorite person. She'd see the way she would treat the girls but knew better than to get involved in teenage drama. If she had know all that would lead to Alison's 'murder' and later on to her daughters (and her friends) torture by this 'A' person, she would have stepped in. But she hadn't and there was nothing she could do to change that.

All she could hope for since that night was that Emily didn't decide to be with Alison. She could see that Alison would never love Emily the way Paige did, not one bit.

* * *

_The wind ruffles her_ hair as she makes her way to Alison's house. The talk with her mom had helped give her the push she needed to confront the blonde, something she knew she had to do but had been dreading. She wasn't exactly sure how Alison felt about her, so the conversation could go bad or terrible. There really was no in-between.

The kiss with Ali had caught her by surprise, and she wondered why she hadn't tried to stop her. In her mind she tried to convince herself that she had done it to try to straighten out her feelings for Alison; but she couldn't help and wander if it had been more selfish than that. She wanted to believe that Alison wasn't just playing games with her anymore, that she wasn't just collecting love from the people around her. Yet deep down there was a nagging feeling in her heart that told her she hadn't changed. She'd seen it when she'd caught her and Paige out in the woods behind her house; the cruel manipulative Alison they had know. But then there was the Ali that was sweet and caring to her; that made her feel special.

"Alison." She calls out to the girl as she makes her way up the DiLaurentis driveway. The petite blonde is sitting on a bench outside on her porch. She looks up from writing on her journal as Emily slowly walks up the porch steps.

"Emily, if it isn't you in the flesh. " Emily frowns as Alison closes the small book and sets in on the ground, subtly dragging it under the bench with her foot. Journals are never a good thing when it comes to Alison.

She shakes her head slightly as she meets Alison's gaze. Alison's looking at her with such intensity that it makes her squirm and glance away. She slides her hands into her jeans back pockets, finally meeting Alison's eyes. "I came to talk to you."

Alison smirks as she leans back against into the bench, "Well we're talking, so spill." Alison clings tightly to the small amount of authority she has managed to maintain. The girls aren't under her thumb anymore, something that makes her feel uncomfortable. The weeks after she had 'returned' had been unhinging. It seemed like Spencer had given each of the girls a bit of her back bone; they were all standing up to her.

"I just came to tell you that I'm going to California." She holds her breath as she waits for Alison's reaction. She's not sure what to expect, she doesn't know the Alison sitting in front of her.

Alison scoffs, an unimpressed look on her face, "You're seriously choosing McCullers over me?"

Emily frowns as she stares at Alison, "Yes. It took me this long to realize that I've been confusing the way I feel about you now with the way I felt about you. I love you, but it's the same love I feel for Hanna, Spencer and Aria. I love you…But I'm not in love with you." She takes a deep breath. "I realize it was never a choice. I needed to get my head straight-" Alison smirks, Emily choosing to ignore it as she continues, "But it's always been Paige."

Alison stands slowly, taking a few steps until she's face to face with Emily, "But what about our kiss?" She traces her finger across along Emily's jaw, a small sneer on her lips "Don't tell me you didn't enjoy it?"

"What?" Emily's voice is barely more than a whisper.

"Oh Emily. Did you really think I'd ever be with you? You're just practice, remember?" Alison cups her cheek softly, "But don't worry. Maybe Paige will take you back."

Her teasing voice makes Emily flinch and she takes a step back, away from Alison's burning touch.

She had been playing her.

She swallows as she turns her back and shakily walks down the steps, away from Alison. She wants to run, to get as far from her as she can, but she won't give Alison the satisfaction. Alison's attitude changes faster than a lighting strike; the sweet and caring girl disappears in a flash and is replaced with the malicious Alison Paige and Spencer had warned her about. The one that threw Emily's love back at her face.

Emily barely has time to step into her house before the tears begin to fall. She has know, deep down, that Alison was still the same. But that didn't make it hurt any less when it finally blew up in her face.

The only thing that made her feel better was that she'd be seeing Paige in 2 days. 48 hrs. Just 48 hours until her heart could feel whole again.

* * *

_Two songs that helped me with this; Lifetime by Emeli Sande. Let Me Go by Avril Lavigne ft Chad Kroeger (I feel like the beginning of the song is Emily moving on from Alison, the last chorus is her not letting Paige go). _

_If there's any scenes you guys might like to see, and that I can work into the story, let me know and I'll try to fit it in. _

**_Please review, they make my day, and seriously keep me going. 3_**


	10. Next Stop, Heart Ache

_**A/N: **A quick update guys. Hope you like this chapter, let me know what you think. I'm trying to focus on this story which is why I haven't updated my other story in a while, but I already have the 3rd chapter halfway done so I might update it soon. I also have a one-shot that's been halfway done for the past month, I have writers block on that one. and I also have another idea that's been on my mind for a little over a month. So my minds a little on over drive right now. but anyways enjoy :) _

* * *

Paige watches in amusement as Violet traces her hand over the roof of her Camaro, a slow whistle passing her puckered lips as she admires the powerful car.

"Damn Sharky. Are you planning on being in the next Fast and Furious movie?"

She meets Violet's teasing smirk with one of her own, "Maybe. I just need a muscle shirt, leather jacket and combat boots and I'll be good to go." She tucks her hands into the back pockets of her denim shorts as she leans against the front of her car.

Violet chuckles and rolls her eyes, hiding a mischievous grin as she kneels down.

Paige unconsciously stares at Violet as she pulls her socks over her strong calves, her biceps flexing as she stands and ties her hair into a loose ponytail, "Well at least your outfit goes better with the car than my soccer uniform."

Violet had invited Paige to her soccer practice when the latter had mentioned she had nothing to do until later in the afternoon. They made small talk as they walked, and when Paige had mentioned her new car Violet had insisted on 'checking out her new ride', as she had put it, before going to the soccer fields.

Heat rushes to her cheeks as Violet raises her eyebrow in amusement when she notices her staring. She tries to hide it with a smirk as her eyes roam over Violet's uniform.

_What the hell's going on with you McCullers?_

She's not sure what to make of her new bluntness. She had never outright checked out at a girl before, other than Emily of course. Her outright staring being the reason Alison had discovered the way Paige felt about her. After Alison threatened her with her letter she had made sure to stick to quick peeks despite the fact that she could never fully appreciate Emily's beauty with those stolen glances.

Thinking about Emily fills her heart with a pang. She clears her throat, trying to clear her mind of Emily, knowing the other girl probably hasn't thought of her since she left.

She pushes off the car with her hips, "Hey at least it looks good on you."

And it's true. Violet's wearing a white shirt with the words Stanford stamped across the chest, the number 14 displayed proudly on the back. It's tucked inside white loose shorts that end half way down her thighs, leaving enough skin uncovered between them and her socks to make Paige's mind wander.

Violet's bangs fall over her eye, the blue tips brushing her cheek. She subtly flips her bangs out of her eye with a small shake of her head, the teasing smile never leaving her lips "You don't look too shabby yourself."

She consciously glances down at her outfit. Her black Vans are comfy, and despite the fact that they're worn-down she can't seem to let them go. Her loose fitting plaid shirt ends a little past her waist. She had rolled up the sleeves to her elbows and unbuttoned the top of her shirt since the afternoon was quickly becoming hotter. When she catches Violet staring at the expose skin across her chest she wonders if it's more than just the afternoon sun that's making her skin flush.

Violet's eyes meet hers, both girls chuckling nervously. She lightly shoves her shoulders against Violet's as she makes her way past her, "Come one. You're gonna be late for practice."

* * *

The soft grass tickles her bare legs while she watches in amazement as Violet runs around the field. She's just as agile in the field as she was in the water, something Paige wasn't ashamed to admit they shared in common. Paige yells excitedly as Violet makes another goal, the hazel eyed brunette sending a shy smile her way as her team engulfs her in a hug. Despite it being just a practice game all the girls are giving it their all, their competitive nature taking over even if they're playing against their own teammates.

A sharp whistle makes Paige turn automatically, a small smirk pulling at her lips when she realizes it's not directed at her but at the team.

"Good job girls! If we keep this up we'll be more than ready for the season." The short blonde that's been yelling orders at the girls for the past hour claps her hands together "Hit the showers girls, practice is over." The coach walks off toward a bench, her shoulders hunched as she scribbles on her notebook.

"So what do you think?"

Paige looks away from the coach, startled by Violet's voice. She smirks as she takes in Violet's cocky grin. "Eh, you're alright." She laughs as Violet playfully glares and softly kicks her ball at her, Paige stopping it with her hand before it hits her thigh. "I'm joking. You're really good." She throws the ball back at Violet who grins widely; she catches it easily in her hands before letting it fall to her feet.

"You up for a little one vs one?"

She laughs as Violet wiggles her eyebrows, her bangs falling over her eye.

"How do you even play with your bangs in your face?" She had caught Violet brushing the bangs back continuously during practice.

"I'm use to it." She swiftly kicks the ball into the air which causes the bangs to once again fall over her eye. Violet simply flips them out of her eye with a shake of her head, causing Paige to roll her eyes at Violet who's now juggling the ball, alternating between using her knees and feet to keep it off the ground.

"Show off." She rips some grass and flings it at her causing Violet to laugh. "How about we hit the pool instead?"

"I'm in." Violet lets the ball fall to the ground, extending her hand out for Paige to take.

She smiles as she takes Violet's warm hand in hers and stands. Violet doesn't let go right away and neither does she. Again she can't help and compare Emily's hands to Violet's.

She shakes her head and quickly lets go, kicking the ball away from Violet as she jogs towards the direction of the pools. She glances back at Violet who stares at her with a bemused expression.

"Hurry up V! My grandma reacts faster than you."

Violet shakes her head at Paige's teasing. She takes off after her, smirking as she hears Paige utter a quick "Oh shit" when she catches up to her.

"Hey!" Paige curses as Violet easily takes the ball away from her, her competitiveness taking hold of her. She can feel Violet's teammate's eyes on them, just like she had the whole time they were talking, but she doesn't care. All she can focus on is the ball being easily maneuvered by Violet's agile feet. "Damn it."

"Who's the grandma now Sharky!" Violet yells over her shoulder.

"Just wait till we get in the water!" She yells back at her.

A wide grin spreads across her face as Violet laughs. It's been so long since she's felt this rush; the adrenaline of feeling completely free. It won't last long, she knows that. But she's willing to make the most of it.

* * *

"Woooo! California here we come!" Hanna's over enthusiastic voice earns her more irritated than amused looks as they make their way to their seats.

"Hanna we've been on the plane less than 30 seconds and already people are planning on how to get us kicked off." Spencer rolls her eyes as Hanna shrugs, unaffected by her comment or the dirty looks people are giving them.

"It's not my fault they didn't drink enough caffeine to get them through this flight." She takes a seat next to Emily, who simply shakes her head at the overly hyper blonde.

"Han, its 10 pm. This is a 5 hr flight, people want to sleep through it, not be kept awake by your ramblings." She meets Spencer's amused look as she sits next to Hanna, the blonde stuck between them.

"Whatever, this is technically Spencer's fault." Spencer gives her an exasperated look. "You gave me some of your Hasting's 'not for the weak' coffee."

"I didn't shove it down your throat" Spencer argues back.

"Well I didn't have any option but to drink it!" Hanna pouts. "I was desperate."

"It was your fault we couldn't stop at The Brew to get coffee!" Spencer rubs her temples impatiently. "Only you would take two hours packing your suitcase."

Emily rolls her eyes at her friends bickering. She had spent the majority of the day anxiously awaiting their departure. She hadn't told her friends about what had happened with Alison, neither the kiss nor the conversation (if she could even call it that) that they had. She knew they wouldn't give her the "I told you so" speech, but she still felt stupid for not seeing through Alison's act sooner.

"Em, you okay?" Spencer's voice snaps her from her musings as she turns and sees her leaning across Hanna.

"Yeah. I'm fine." When it seems like they don't believe her she smiles a little. "I'm just nervous."

"Why? You know Paige is going to take you back." Hanna taps her fingers rapidly against the armrest.

There's that assurance that everyone that knows her and Paige seems to have, she can't help the sharp tone of her voice as she replies, "Why does everyone say that? Why is everyone so sure that Paige will take me back?"

Her gaze flits between Hanna and Spencer, who stare at her as if she's the one that chugged down Spencer's coffee, which should seriously come with a warning label.

Spencer's the first to react, leaning over and patting her knee softly. "Because we can see the way Paige looks at you."

She sighs in frustration. That doesn't make her feel any better.

"And what exactly do you see when Paige looks at me?"

Spencer glances at Hanna before she speaks, meeting Emily's eyes determinedly, letting her know she's only going to say this once, so she better listen. "She looks at you…like you're the reason the sun rises and sets every day. As if the only reason the sun sets is so the moon can get a chance to look at you." Emily stares dumbfounded at her. "The look in her eyes when she gazes at you, even if it's just for a second, is so completely filled with love and hope that everyone around you two can feel it. It's as if she can find the answers to all of life's questions with just a smile on your face, a kiss from your lips or a touch of your hands." Spencer smiles as she squeezes her knee. "Sometimes I'm jealous of the love that girl has for you."

Hanna grins as she bumps her shoulder against a shocked Emily, "Careful Emily, I think you might have some competition."

Spencer scoffs as she leans back against her seat. She can tell Emily's thinking about what she just said.

"What do you see when I look at her?" She asks Spencer, who leans forwards again to study her.

"You're scared." She frowns at Spencer's words, she opens her mouth to ask what she means but Spencer continues. "You're scared about the way you feel about Paige, because you never thought you'd love anyone more than you loved Maya-"

"Or Alison" Hanna pitches in.

"But you do. You love her more than you loved either of them, and it fucking frightens you; because you thought you loved those girls more than you ever could, yet Paige has made you realize your love can go further than that."

Emily looks away as she slumps down into her seat. Spencer and Hanna deciding it best to leave her to her thoughts.

Is it true? She frowns as she looks out the planes window. She thinks about it for a long time, long enough that the plane has taken off and both of her friends are fast asleep beside her.

Finally, she can feel deep in her heart that Spencer's right.

She had been scared of the way Paige made her feel because everyone she loved got taken from her. Alison, Maya. She was scared of showing her love for Paige because she didn't want the only good thing in her life to get taken away by A. But with A gone, it had been her that pushed Paige away.

_You only know you love her when you let it go._

The faint music coming from Hanna's earphones makes her lean her head against her shoulder.

_'Cause you only need the light when it's burning low  
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow  
Only know you love her when you let her go_

_And you let her go._

She sighs. Well now you know you love her Emily. You've always know. You better hope it's not too late. She gazes out into the dark sky, the faint light from the moon shining through, Spencer words replaying in her mind. _As if the only reason the sun sets is so the moon can get a chance to look at you._

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_Reviews? Tell me what you think :)_

**_Disclaimer: Song used is Let Her Go by Passenger, but I'm sure you all knew that already._**


	11. Surprise

_A/N:_

_Wow, an **update**.Didn't think you'd be seeing those words again? Me neither haha jk but seriously sorry for the long wait. Life happens and I wasn't in the right mindset to write. But anyways this one goes out to the guest/s that wanted me to update (like a month ago) **I'm sorry okay?** Anyways, enjoy. Hopefully. _

* * *

"Emily, are you going to call her or are you just going to stare at your phone willing it to dial itself?"

Spencer's patience is wearing thin as she stares at Emily's lingering finger, silently begging it to tap the screen and finally call Paige. They are staying on the top floor of a comfy hotel a few miles from Stanford. They had slept in late after getting to the hotel in the early hours of dawn and despite Hanna's complaints of being tired, she had stood by the window and watched the sun rise with her two best friends.

It is now the middle of the day and Hanna's complaints haven't ended. The grumpy blonde is impatiently tapping her foot as she leans against the window. They were waiting for Emily to call Paige before the three of them went to have lunch in the hotels small café.

"What if her phone's still not working?" Emily bites her lip nervously.

Hanna steps away from the window with a groan and flops down onto the bed, "We've been here for almost an hour waiting for you to call." She rests her hands on her stomach and pouts, "I'm starving. And if her phone's still not working then we'll get our asses over to Stanford and ask around for her like a bunch of lost idiots."

Emily shakes her head at the blonde and turns her gaze to her phone. She stares at Paige's contact name. Just one quick tap and she would be able to hear Paige's voice. If her phone was working that is.

_Just…one… tap._

She slowly lowers her thumb onto the screen but sighs exasperated before it makes contact and holds her phone out for Spencer to take. "Here. You call her." She glares at Hanna when a muffled 'pussy' comes from her direction. "I wanted to surprise Paige anyways."

Spencer rolls her eyes and pushes Emily's hand away as she plops down next to her. "She'll know something's up if I call her from your phone."

"Right." She bites her lip as Spencer pulls out her phone, her fingers working quickly over the screen as she dials Paige's number. Soon enough the quiet hotel room is filled with the ringing of the phone as Spencer sets it on speaker. Emily expects the call to go straight to voicemail, but when Paige's voice comes through the phones speakers her heart starts racing.

"Hello?"

Spencer clears her throat, smirking slightly as she watches Emily nervously twirl her phone in her hand. "Hey Paige, I hope I'm not bothering you." She says nonchalantly.

There's a slight shuffling on the other end of the call before Paige's voice fills the room again, "No, not at all. Is something wrong? Is Emily alright?"

"Emily's fine, don't worry." Spencer suppresses the urge to roll her eyes. Of course that's what Paige would ask first. "I'm fine too, thanks for asking."

A small smile pulls at Emily's lips when she hears Paige chuckle. She didn't realize how much she missed Paige's voice. Or maybe she did; she just didn't want to admit it to herself.

"Sorry. What's up Hastings?" Paige asks.

"Well, I have something here that I need to send you."

"What is it?" Paige asks hesitantly, almost suspiciously.

"It's a surprise McCullers." Spencer teases.

"I don't like surprises."

"Well that's too bad. So if you could just give me your address and dorm number that would be great."

Hanna lies down next to Emily and whispers in her ear, "She used to be a much better liar." Emily silently shushes her as she listens to Paige's response. Although Hanna was right; they all use to be good liars. But the truth had always bit them in the ass. This, in her opinion, was a harmless lie. Or at least that's what she was telling herself.

"What if I don't like the surprise?" Paige asks teasingly, drawing Emily back into the conversation at hand.

Spencer smirks as she quirks her eyebrow, her eyes roaming over Emily's pajama clad body, "Oh I think you'll definitely like this surprise."

"If it's anything like that surprise hockey stick to my ankle freshman year, you can keep it."

The teasing tone of Paige's voice makes Emily smile. She sounds better than she did a week ago. That lost and broken crack in her voice was gone. In its place was that cheerful spark that always pulled Emily in. Sudden guilt curses through Emily as she thinks about how Paige might react to seeing her. Everyone is so certain that Paige would _want_ to see her, but what if all that did was bring Paige down again? What if Paige was better off without her?

"It's not, trust me." Spencer says distractedly as she frowns at Emily, whose smile has vanished.

Paige notices the change in Spencer's tone and decides to stop teasing her, "Alright, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt this time. I'll give you my address. Just answer me one thing."  
She hesitates before saying, "Is Emily...is she with..."

"No, she's not with Alison." Spencer smiles sadly at Emily, giving her a knowing look. It didn't surprise her that Paige would be worried about that. And if anything, it just confirmed that Paige was still hoping that Emily hadn't given up on them.

* * *

"Are you alright?" Violet asks worriedly.

Paige smiles weakly as she walks back towards Violet and puts her phone away, the slim rectangle fitting perfectly into her back pocket. "Yeah, everything's fine. Spencer just had a quick question."

They begin to walk across the quad again, the slight wind ruffling their hair. They were on their way back from training, their skin flushed and covered in a thin sheet of sweat under the warm California sun.

Violet runs her fingers through her damp hair, "Spencer is one of Emily's best friends right? The one you gave the stuff to?"

"Yup. Hastings. The one that's overbearingly protective and aggressively competitive." Paige states with a smirk.

Violet smiles teasingly at her, "Sounds a lot like you."

Paige tilts her head thoughtfully, "Yeah, I guess we have some similarities." She smiles, thinking about how far their friendship has come and how different things were between them back in freshman year.

The two had clashed more times than she cared to remember. And things had definitely gotten worse when Alison up'd her bullying antics. But ironically enough it had been Alison who had brought the two girls closer; their shared hesitancy of welcoming Alison back with open arms drawing them together.

Paige blushes when Violet bumps their shoulders together gently, her mind focusing once more on the present. They enter their dorm building, the air conditioned room cooling their warm skin instantly.

"So? Are we still on for tonight or what?" Violet asks as they make their way up the stairs to their rooms.

"Yeah. But I think I'll just watch you this time. I do karaoke, not open mic." Paige jokes. It wasn't that she minded doing an open mic, although she did prefer karaoke, but doing anything like that with someone that wasn't Emily, well…it just didn't feel right. Karaoke was their thing, no matter how much coaxing Paige had to do to get Emily up on stage with her. And as much as she enjoyed being with Violet, she wasn't ready to share that kind of experience with anyone but Emily.

_You're such a sap McCullers_

Paige shakes her head, meeting Violet's quizzical expression, "Sure you're alright Sharky?"

"Yeah. I'm fine. Just…" She hesitates, biting her lip. She's talked enough about Emily since she met Violet, surely the soccer player was getting tired of hearing about her pathetic love life.

"Thinking about Emily, I know." Paige looks away embarrassed. "Hey it fine." Violet places her hand reassuringly on Paige's arm. "Like my mom always said before my soccer games, 'Sácalo de tu sistema'"

Paige looks up at her in confusion, "Huh?"

"Oh right," Violet chuckles. "It means 'Get it out of your system'. That's the reason my mom signed me up for soccer when I was little. Too much pent up energy and a smart ass attitude, she was about ready to rip her hair out." Paige chuckles as she watches Violet smile fondly at the memory. "Too bad I took that literally. I got kicked out of 4 teams before I finally understood that _getting it out of my system_ didn't include tackling and shoving my opponents."

"No way," Paige laughs, imagining a mini Violet running around the soccer field shoving little girls to the ground.

"Yes way. Trust me, I was such a handful when I was little."

"And now?" Paige questions teasingly.

Violet quirks her eyebrow mischievously, "Well I haven't gotten us in trouble yet, have I?"

Paige smirks, her hand reaching for her keys as they approach her room, "Key word, _yet_." She stops at her door while Violet continues down the hall.

Violet turns around to face Paige and walks backwards as she smiles coyly at her, "Exactly. I'll come by around eight?"

"Sure. See you then."

* * *

Emily taps her feet nervously against the passenger seat. It's seven-thirty and they're finally on their way to Paige's, much to her friend's relief.

She watches the street lights pass like giant fireflies as she stares out the window. If she weren't so nervous she'd be admiring her first real glimpse of Stanford as Spencer navigates them through Campus Drive, the road leading them into Stanford itself.

There's something fascinating about being somewhere new. Somewhere completely foreign to you. It's quite strange; exhilarating even. Emily wonders if this is how Paige felt when she first moved to California. That thought alone makes her pay attention to the streets they're driving past. She lets her gaze linger on as many details as she can. The building, trees, signs and even the people. What did Paige think of all of this? Did she like California so far?

"Hey Em, you sure you don't want us to go with you? We could just wait outside her dorm while you talk to her." Hanna suggests, leaning between the passenger and driver's seat to look back at her.

"No, it's fine. Really." She smiles reassuringly at them, or at least she hopes it reassuring, but from the look she catches Spencer giving her on the rearview mirror they must not be buying it. She sighs, "Seriously, I'll be fine. You two just go drive around. I'll txt you if I need anything. I promise."

Spencer nods slowly, "Alright." She pulls into the side of the road. "Well, here we are."

Emily glances across the street at the dark orange block like buildings. Paige lives in the house named 'Burbank' in Stern Hall. Second story, room 115. She takes a deep breath as she opens the car door and steps out into the cool evening. To her right is an open field, street lights down the road illuminate what she assumes is a court of some sort. She turns to her left again and faces the dorm buildings, lucky for her Paige's building is right across the street.

"You sure you'll be alright on your own?" Hanna asks as she leans out of the window.

"Yes, Hanna. I don't need to be babysat." She rolls her eyes. As much as she appreciates her friends concerns it was seriously starting to annoy her.

Hanna lifts her hands in surrender, "Okay, just making sure." She quirks her eyebrow and grins mischievously, "In the meantime Spencer and I will be hunting for some hotties."

Spencer groans, "Ugh you make it sound like we're desperate."

"Well we are!" Hanna exclaims.

"Maybe _you _are." Spencer retorts.

Emily can't help but laugh at the bickering girls. "Guys!"

Hanna smiles reassuringly as she looks back at her,"Everything will be fine. Call us when you want us to pick you up."

Emily nods and watches as their rental car drives down the street. Her smile falters as she gazes at the building Paige is staying in. She sighs.

_This is it._

She stuffs her hands into her jacket pockets as she makes her way across the street, each step taking her closer to Paige.

* * *

"Come in!"

Paige hurries to tie the laces of her combat boots as she glances at her phone.

_7:35_.

Either Violet liked being extremely early or she forgot they weren't suppose to meet until 8. Paige had finished getting ready 20 minutes ago and had been staring at her ceiling since then, thinking about a certain someone back in Rosewood.

Another knock, this one louder, pounds at the door and she sighs exasperated. Did Violet not hear her when she told her to come in? She finishes tying her laces and stands, quickly walking towards the door. She has a smirk ready on her lips as she opens the door. "Aren't you-"

Her smirk fades and her eyes widen as she meets the brown eyes that have been haunting her in her dreams. She grips the doorknob tightly as she blinks, sure she's finally lost it and is imagining the raven haired girl standing in front of her; the girl that was suppose to be back in Rosewood, unattainable and out of Paige's reach.

Emily shifts awkwardly, her gaze momentarily leaving Paige's. "Paige."

Hearing Emily say her name breaks her out of the weird trance she's in. She clears her throat,"Emily? What are you doing here?"

* * *

So? Let me know what you think :) Hopefully the next update won't take me so long. *No promises tho*


	12. Lies

**A/N: **_Hey guys! Quick thanks to everyone for sticking around. All the support's truly appreciated. 3 weeks to update, not as quickly as I would have liked to update but better than 2 months right? Anyways, enjoy this chapter. Hopefully._

* * *

As soon as Paige says her name, it feels like her world's coming together once again. The scattered pieces that have been her life for the past few months feel like they're being pulled together by the way Paige says her name; the way her lips shape each letter, each one laced with disbelief. But as soon as Paige questions why she's there, the pulling halts and her world is once again caught in a discomforting mix of self doubt and blurred emotions. Emily stands awkwardly, shifting her weight from one foot to the other as she stares at Paige's outfit. She bites her lip; she obviously caught Paige in the middle of something worth dressing up for.

"I'm sorry I didn't call you before coming. Well...Spencer sort of did that for me." The words stumble out of her mouth, she meets Paige's gaze for a split second before looking over Paige's shoulder and into her dorm; it's empty, much to Emily's relief. She sighs, "I just…can I come in?" Paige is still starting at her like she's grown another head, but she nods and steps back, giving Emily enough space to walk inside.

She walks past Paige, and when she catches the faint scent of her perfume, Emily presses her hands deeper into her pockets and steps hurriedly into the room as the urge to wrap her arms around Paige's shoulders and close the distance between them becomes unbearable.

Paige turns slowly to face her, pushing the door closed gently. She studies Emily as the tan girl looks around her room. "So you're the surprise Spencer was talking about?" She asks, moving slowly towards Emily, as if any sudden movement would cause her to disappear.

"I hope it's better than a hockey stick to the ankle." Emily teases, trying to break the awkward tension that still fills the air. She turns to face Paige and her breath once again catches in her throat. It feels like forever since she's seen Paige's brown eyes, her full lips that are now pulled into a slight smirk.

"It's definitely better than that." Paige says, her smirk turning into a hesitant smile. She lets herself admire Emily in a way she hasn't been able to in such a long time. Her gaze lingers on Emily's face, on every little detail she thought she had forgotten. But it'd be impossible to forget anything when it came to Emily. If she tried hard enough she'd be able to remember what it was like to hold her, to kiss her.

Paige looks away.

She can't do that. She can't keep torturing herself like that. Especially not when Emily's so close to her. Not close enough for her liking; but close enough that one small movement could spark the flame they've both thought had extinguished. And Paige can't let herself spark that fire; not when she still doesn't know what Emily's doing here.

Emily's hands tighten into fists as Paige looks away. She wants to take the last few steps that are keeping her away from Paige and make them disappear; make them disappear long enough so she can press her palm gently against Paige's cheek and tell her not to look away.

Emily clears her throat, causing Paige to glance up at her. Her eyes are guarded again; the vulnerability that seeped through seconds ago no longer there. "You're probably wondering what I'm doing here."

"Yeah, probably." Paige jokes. She takes off her leather jacket and sets it on the back of her chair. She gestures at Emily to make herself comfortable, vaguely sweeping her hand in front of her. The only places to sit are her bed, her roommates' bed and the chair across from Paige. Paige watches as Emily sits carefully on her bed and trails her hand slowly over the familiar comforter. It's the same one Paige had in Rosewood. Emily smiles, thinking that this was Paige's way of dealing with feeling homesick. The truth was that Paige had brought it along because Emily's faint perfume still lingered on the warm blanket.

"Why are you here Emily?" Paige asks softly.

Emily meets her gaze. The intensity in Paige's brown eyes makes her already frenzy heart beat faster. She rubs her palms against her jeans. "I came to talk to you."

"There's a phone for that Em." Paige replies. She didn't dare let herself hope that Emily was there for- _Stop it, McCullers. Don't get ahead of yourself._

"I know." Emily mumbles, glancing down at her hands as she wrings them together. "I'd rather do this in person though."

Paige smiles, trying to ease Emily's nerves, "Okay, I'm all ears."

* * *

"Hanna?" Aria glances at her phone, making sure the call hasn't ended. She presses her phone to her ear just as Hanna's voice blares through the speakers, "Aria! Can you hear me!?"

"Sheesh Hanna," Aria scolds, "any louder and you'll make me deaf." She walks towards her kitchen, glancing up the stairs to make sure the coast is clear.

"Good, maybe then you won't be able to hear Alison bitching all the time." Hanna smirks, avoiding a playful swat from Spencer. Despite the fact that none of them were exactly thrilled at having Alison back in their lives, Hanna was the only outspoken one about it.

Aria glances uneasily behind her, sighing in relief when she sees there's no one there. "Tell me about it. She's been bugging me all day. Apparently Emily won't answer her phone calls and neither will Spencer." She opens her fridge, looking for something to drink. "I can't get her out of my hair." She complains. "I had to ditch Ezra because she wanted to spend time together."

"Yeah I think it'd be awkward spending time with both of them, considering they were together once or whatever." Hanna scoffs, shrugging off Spencer's glare as she continues to flip through the small menu of the café they're sitting at.

"I know. So where _are_ Emily and Spencer?" Aria asks as she spots a cartoon of orange juice at the back of the fridge.

"Well Spencer's currently giving me the death stare." Hanna rolls her eyes. "It just got deadlier."

Aria laughs quietly as she grabs the juice. "And Emily?"

"Emily's with Paige."

"Wait, really?" Aria beams. "She's already talking to Paige? I thought she'd wait longer."

Hanna shoves her menu at Spencer and points to a picture of mozzarella sticks as the waiter makes his way towards them. "So did we. She seemed really eager to talk to her though. And nervous. She almost puked on the way to Stanford."

Aria laughs, happy that Emily finally gets to talk to Paige. She's more than ready to see Emily smile again, especially that smile only Paige seems to cause. She's about to close the refrigerator door closed with her elbow when a hand reaches out and grabs it. Aria jumps back, startled as Alison grins at her.

"Need some help with that?"

* * *

Alison takes out her phone as she walks down Aria's driveway. She smirks, her thumbs tapping away at the screen. She glances back as she sends her message and waves at Aria who's looking at her from the living room window. If Emily thought getting back with Paige was going to be that easy, she had a surprise coming her way. She places her phone inside her purse, a wicked grin forming on her lips.

* * *

Paige waits patiently as Emily struggles for words, her mouth opening slightly then closing, her lips pressing into a thin line when she can't figure out how to word her feelings. Their eyes meet and Emily caves when the patience and kindness in Paige's eyes pierce through her heart. "I-" Her words are cut off as a sharp ringing emerges from Paige's jacket pocket. Emily curses the damn device for interrupting, glancing quickly behind Paige, silently asking if she was going to get that. Paige hesitates, whoever it is can wait. She's about to say as much when she remembers she's suppose to meet Violet. She smiles sheepishly at Emily as she reaches for her phone.

"It's probably my friend." She swipes her thumb across the screen, "We were suppose to hang out tonight but I'll just cancel and…" Her words die in her throat as she reads the message.

**How does it feel being Emily's second choice? One steamy make out session and she's practically mine. I turn her down and she goes running back to you. You'll always be her second choice pigskin.  
-Alison  
**  
She frowns as she rereads the message, each word stabbing at her chest until it she fixes her gaze on the name at the end. _Alison_. She scoffs, forcefully pressing the button on her phone until the screen turns black. Leave it up to Alison to try and ruin this moment for her, whatever this was. Either way she wasn't going to let Alison drag her back into her fucked up games.

"Is everything okay?"

She looks up sharply, her lips pressed into a thin line as she studies Emily. There's a slight crease on her forehead, her gaze full of concern. She's almost shrugs and lets the whole thing slide. _Almost_.  
She bites her lip, a lump forming in her throat. _This would be so damn easier if you weren't staring at me like that._ She clears her throat as she tears her eyes away from Emily's warm brown ones and glares at her phone. She starts to speak, the words forming carefully in her mind, and cautiously breaking the silence between them. "What happened…between you and Alison?"

Emily widens her eyes as the question catches her by surprise. "Nothing happened." The lie flows from her lips smoothly, something she's gotten used to over the past years. She immediately regrets it as Paige sighs.

"Are you sure?" Paige's voice is full of a desperate kind of hope. Hope that Emily's telling her the truth. Hope that Alison's lying and this is just another one of her nasty tricks. But underneath that hope is a betraying certainty that Alison's txt might be true. She stares at Emily's throat as she gulps, her hands fidgeting once more on her lap.

Emily glances wearily at Paige's hand were her phone is tightly gripped. "We…kissed." She mumbles pathetically, almost apologetic.

Paige stays quite, a million thoughts racing through her mind as she fights off the nausea that's building up in the pit of her stomach. She frowns again as Alison's txt flashes through her mind. _One steamy make out session and she's mine._ She meets Emily's guilty gaze, "Kissed?"

Emily wants to lie again. Erase the mistake she made a week ago with a simple "yes" but she knows in the end that'll only make things worse. She swallows, "We made out."

Paige scoffs and stands abruptly as unmistakable anger replaces the nausea she felt. Her knuckles turn white as she grips her phone tightly in her fist. She shouldn't be angry, she has no right to be angry. They had broken up after all. She glances at Emily, who's slumped down and avoiding her gaze.

"When?" She asks reluctantly. Emily shakes her head. "_When_ Emily?"

"The night after you left." Emily's voice is pained, and tears sting the back of her eyes. She flinches when Paige rips her jacket roughly from the back of the chair. "Paige, please. Let me explain."

"Explain what, Emily?" Paige snaps, her vision blurring as she fights back the tears that threaten to spill onto her cheeks. "That things didn't work out for you two and now you're here? You kiss her and run back to me when she rejects you?"

Emily's voice cracks as she stares desperately into Paige's eyes. "No Paige, it wasn't like that. She kissed me first, I didn't..."

"You didn't what, Emily." Paige retorts. She crosses her arms over her chest, hugging herself as Emily's tears run down her cheeks. She's torn between being pissed and wanting to crouch next to Emily and comfort her. "Where you even going to tell me?"

Emily's silence answers for her. No, she hadn't been planning on telling her. Of course. It was like Nate all over again. The thought of Nate, or Lyndon to be exact, stirs up a new batch of anger within her. The sudden urge to punch something shocks her. She takes a deep breath, trying to calm herself as she stares at the swimmer that's all but avoiding her gaze as she continues to sit on her bed.

"Hey Paige ready to g-" The door swings open as Violet walks into the room, her words cutting off as she takes in the scene before her. She glances between both girls. _Shit_. She starts to apologize but is cut off by Paige.

"Yeah. I'm ready." Paige avoids Emily's pleading eyes when she calls her name as she grabs her keys. It's nearly impossible and she almost gives in, but one look at the phone held tightly in her grip and her resolve snaps into place.

Violet's steps into the hall, awkwardly glancing at the girl she assumes to be Emily. The girl seems to have all but forgotten her as she stares brokenly at Paige, who stops at the door frame, her hand on the doorknob as she turns to face Emily. "You know," she mutters, her voice hoarse with the strain of fighting back tears. "I thought, that after everything we've been through, you would at least stop lying to me."

The betrayal in her eyes and voice couldn't have hurt Emily any more than they did as Paige turns and shuts the door behind her.

* * *

_I should've warned you that this story's full of angst. But don't worry! It ends happily(probably)._

_Let me know what you think :)_


	13. Try It One More Time

**A/N: **_Hey guys! Sorry about the long wait. I've been busy and well, kind of started writing another fanfic (yup I know I need to stop writing more f__ics until I finish the ones I've started.) but anyways the other fic won't be up until December, and hopefully by then I'll have this one completed. Anywho, here's chapter 13, enjoy, hopefully :)_

* * *

Paige curls her fingers tightly around the steering wheel, the skin around her knuckles turning white as she grips the smooth black leather. She can feel Violet's eyes on her, the patient girl waiting for her to say something. She doesn't know what to say though, so she remains quite and presses down on the accelerator. The roaring of the engine drowns out the silence in the car and she wishes that that was enough to distract her from the whirlwind of thoughts racing through her mind as she replays her conversation with Emily over and over again.

Violet glances anxiously at Paige, her eyes flicking nervously to the rising speedometer. It's clear that Paige won't be the first one to speak so Violet clears her throat, "How do you feel?" She asks timidly, her fingers gripping her seat belt when Paige only responds by pressing her foot down harder on the pedal, the car's engine roaring as it gains more speed. "Okay dumb question." She says hurriedly, glancing nervously at the blur of cars they rush past, "but getting us killed isn't going to solve...whatever happened tonight."

The tremor in the older girls voice slaps common sense into Paige and she mentally scolds herself for scaring Violet, who happens to be right. She doesn't need to make matters worse by crashing; her night's already bad as it is. She releases a slow breath and eases her foot slowly off the pedal, their speed gradually decreasing as the black Camaro drives smoothly down the freeway, no longer at law breaking speed, much to the hazel eyed girls relief.

"How am I suppose to feel, Violet?" She finally answers, her chest tightening as she remembers why she feels the way she does. "She...made out with Alison." she mutters, the words leaving a bitter taste on her tongue.

How _did_ she feel?

Upset?

Definitely.

Pissed?

Getting there.

Betrayed?

No. Not that.

Emily kissing Alison wasn't a betrayal; It was a knife in her chest, the blade twisting her heart painfully every time she thought of Emily kissing Alison the way she use to kiss her. She struggles for air as the image of Emily's lips against Alison's digs the knife deeper into her chest.

The pain etched clearly on Paige's face makes Violet sigh. She hates seeing Paige so broken; she's clearly still in love with Emily, and Violet grudgingly had to admit that if Emily was there then maybe she still felt the same way about Paige, especially considering how broken the girl had looked when Paige walked out the door.

looking at the way Paige is struggling to hold back her tears now, her eyes just as hurt as Emily's had been, Violet decides that Paige's happiness is more important than her crush on her. If Emily still loved Paige, and it meant that Paige will be happy again, Violet would push her growing feelings for the freshman aside and would do whatever she could to make sure the two girls worked things out. "Who cares if she kissed Alison." She shrugs. "She's here, right?"

Paige glances skeptically at her, then remembers she hasn't told Violet about Alison's text. "I got a message from Alison." she explains "Apparently she turned Emily down and that's why she's here. I'm Emily's second choice."

"Wait Alison texted you?" Violet asks surprised. "When?"

"While I was talking to Emily." Paige shrugs, trying to appear nonchalant. She aches to press her foot down on the accelerator again, she wants to feel the rush of adrenaline instead of the pain that's cursing through her body. Violet's voice once again shakes her from her thoughts and she dismisses the idea completely.

"And she said you were Emily's second choice?" Violet stares at her, her eyebrow arching.

"...yeah..." Paige says slowly, emphasizing the word.

Violet brushes her blue bangs aside and studies the brunette. "And you believed her?"

Paige stays quite, her lips pressed in a tight line as she stares at the dark freeway in front of her.

"We're talking about the same Alison right?" Violet questions when she still doesn't say anything. "The one that you told me pretended to be Emily and wrote you a love letter? The girl that practically lives off of lying and making everyone around her miserable. That Alison?"

"...well yeah but.." Paige slumps against her seat, okay Violet had a point. Maybe she had been rash in believing Alison, but that still didn't mean that Emily lying to her was okay.

"But...?" Violet prompts.

"That doesn't change the fact that they made out and Emily wasn't even going to tell me about it!" she exclaims. Her foot accidentally hits the break, causing the car to jolt suddenly. There's a loud honk behind them, followed by the screeching of tires as the car behind them barely manages to swerve into the thankfully clear lane next to them, narrowly missing the Camaro's bumper. Paige quickly regains her composure, her heart hammering in her chest as she pushes down on the gas, effectively putting the car in a steady speed again.

She glances at Violet, the older girls eyes are wide, one of her arm is pressed against the door while she clutches Paige's forearm with her other hand. "I'm so sorry." Paige apologizes, her eyes roaming over Violet's shocked face before quickly settling on the road again. After a couple minutes of silence, when Violet's heart is no longer in danger of exploding, she takes a deep breath and lets go of Paige's arm, deciding to ignore the near death experience, for now.

"Maybe she wasn't going to tell you because it meant nothing to her." Violet mutters her reply to Paige's previous dilemma, still not quite believing that she's going to help her crush get back together with her ex.

"And what if it did, mean something to her." Paige clarifies.

Violet rolls her eyes at Paige's obvious lack of intuition, "Then she wouldn't be here dumbass."

_That__'__s true_, Paige thinks, reluctant to fully let the truth of what that could mean sink in. She didn't want to get ahead of herself, again. Maybe Emily did want to get back together (_maybe, McCullers. jeez)_, but if that was true; the lying? The hiding things from each other because it seemed easier than talking things out? It all had to stop. Alison had been the main reason that Emily had kept things and lied to her, but that was when A was still around; and tonight Alison had been more than happy to tell her 'the truth".

Emily lied to her tonight because she chose to, and it all had to stop. Back in Rosewood she had been tired of always worrying that Emily was keeping things from her, that she was never being fully honest. Mainly because it meant that Paige couldn't protect Emily when she was kept out of the loop; but the lying and lack of trust had been the main causes of the drift that pushed them apart. If they planned on working things out they would have to be, was she really going to say this?

They would have to be friends first. _Yeah like that__'__s worked out so well in the past. _But they needed a fresh start; _she_ needed a fresh start, and she needed to build her trust in Emily again. They both needed that honestly.

Violet clears her throat, and Paige smiles apologetically, "I guess that's true. Before, if she had shown up at my door like she did tonight, I would've been on her lap like a puppy, eager to get back together and start over again. But now." She sighs, "things are complicated. I'm trying to be understanding of what she was going through with Alison. First loves are always hard to get over, right? I would know." she chuckles humorlessly, "But everything that happened between us…It really broke me. She broke my heart, and now she's back and she could mend it..or very well just end up breaking it again."

"Then you need to go talk to her. Clear the air." Violet murmurs, her hand coming to rest reassuringly on the younger girls arm.

"You're right" Paige sighs.

"Aren't I always?" Violet says cockily, her lips pulled into a playful grin.

Paige laughs and rolls her eyes, "Shut up." She takes the next exit off the freeway, her mind a lot clearer than it had been earlier.

* * *

The loud ringing of her phone makes her sigh for the billionth time. It was the fourth time Spencer had called her in the past hour, the time between each call decreasing every time Emily hit _ignore_. She knew Spencer would be getting worried, if she wasn't already, and if she didn't answer or call her back she would be getting quite the lecture later on. She sighs again as she grabs her phone from where it lays discarded on Paige's bed, Spencer's smiling face staring at her as it continues to ring. She knows Spencer is probably not smiling as she waits for Emily to pick up, and sure enough Spencer sounds just as pissed and worried as Emily imagined she would as she finally answers.

"What the hell Emily?" Spencer scolds, "There's this thing called answering your phone, maybe you could try it sometime."

Emily rolls her eyes at the sarcasm dripping from each word Spencer snaps. Maybe waiting for Paige to come back to her dorm hadn't been such a good idea, and maybe she should have answered Spencer's calls; it would've saved her from facing the _Wrath of Spencer_, as Hanna so lovingly put it.

"I am trying it." Emily quips back. "although now I'm regretting it considering the lecture you're about to give me."

She can hear the exasperated sigh Spencer gives, "I'm not going to lecture you Emily. I just think a quick _"__I__'__m fine. I haven__'__t been kidnapped or anything__" _txt would have been nice. I mean, it's not like that wouldn't be the first time something like that happened." Hidden behind Spencer's sarcasm is deeply rooted fear, which Emily can understand given everything they've been through.

"I'm sorry Spence, I just… I'm fine, physically at least." She rubs at her puffy eyes that have begun to irritate with her freehand. "Things didn't go so well with Paige." she swallows, thinking about the way Paige had looked at her before she walked away. "She left and I stayed in her dorm to gather myself before I called you."

Spencer sighs, "Things must have been bad."

"Why do you say that?" Emily wonders.

"You've been there for more than three hours Emily."

"Oh." She bites her lip. She hand't even noticed the time, too preoccupied with her own thoughts and the struggle of whether she should stay and wait for Paige or just leave and call her tomorrow. "I was actually waiting for Paige to come back." she admits, her eyes glancing around the dim room. "I don't think she's coming any time soon."

"Then we'll meet you in the lobby." Spencer says.

"Okay." Before she can hang up Spencer speaks up again.

"And Emily?"

"Yeah?"

"Everything will work out."

Emily smiles, glad someone believes in Paige and her enough to sound so sure when they said that. She hangs up after a murmured _I hope so _and stands, her muscles stiff as she walks towards the door. Her heart feels heavy as she grips the doorknob, afraid that it was going to be the last time she would get to be in Paige's dorm; the dorm that should have been _theirs_. She closes the door quietly behind her before she starts crying again, and walks towards the stairs to the lobby.

* * *

"Do you feel better?"

Paige smiles weakly, her face illuminated by the soft glow from the streetlights, "A little bit."

The night drive had definitely helped calm her, despite the crash scare they had. Running would have been better, she was so use to the physical exertion that came from jogging until she felt like her lungs would burst, and driving at illegally high speeds hadn't given her the same release that running did. She would need to hit the track tomorrow to clear her mind, which was still a mess. She would call Emily after that, ask them to meet somewhere. Hopefully by then she'd know what to say. "I still don't know what I'm going to tell Emily. I just know I don't want her out of my life."

"So being only friends is an option?" Violet asks, hopeful despite her plan to get the two girls back together, _if _that's what they wanted. Whatever Paige decides to do Violet would be there for her.

She chuckles softly, her hands digging into her jean pockets, "Being _only friends_ with Emily was never an option. Not from the beginning and not now. But we're going to have to be until we figure things out." Violet raises her eyebrow. "We've tried before. Numerous times actually. We just sort of always…drifted back to each other. A connection, I called it. No matter how much we tried to stay away from each other, we just…couldn't."

Violet nods, trying to understand how a love like theirs could actually exist. It was like a modern fairy tale, with a twist of horror and mystery thrown in sure, but a fairy tale nonetheless. How was it possible, that after everything the two had been through, they always managed to find their way back to each other? She didn't understand it. The two could very literally be soul mates. _She didn__'__t even believe in soul mate_, yet here she was, probably staring at the very definition of the word.

"Shit."

Violet turns to look at Paige, who's patting her whole body frantically, "Are you okay?" she asks worriedly.

"Yeah yeah" Paige says, she combs her fingers through her hair and smiles reassuringly, "I forgot my phone in the car."

"Oh, just leave it. You can just get it tomorrow."

"No I'll go get it. You go ahead, I'll meet you in the lobby." Paige insists.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'll be right back."

Violet nods as Paige turns and starts making her way back to her car, keys jiggling in her hand. She continuous to walk towards the dorms, her eyes landing on a pair of girls that she's never seen before sitting on a couch. They both turn to look at her, the brunette quickly dismissing her with a raise of her eyebrow as she turns her attention back to the stairs. The other girl however, smiles at her.

_Oh my god_, _she is beautiful. _

The girls perfect face is surrounded by locks of blonde hair, the long curls falling perfectly over her shoulders.

_Okay calm down Violet, she__'__s not even your type. Her eyes are blue okay she__'__s definitely your type. She doesn__'__t even look like she__'__s into girl. Then why did she smile at me? She was just being friendly. Okay stop staring at her you__'__ll freak her out. _Violet blushes as the girl's friendly smile turns into a small smirk, her eyes sparkling with amusement. _Oh my god I__'__m such an idiot. _

She stands by the door like an idiot, mentally debating whether to go and talk to the girl or making a run for it. _Oh what the hell, _she decides, _I already look like a dumbass, might as well go talk to her. Go big or go home. _She takes a step towards the girls then thinks about Paige. She had to get over Paige anyways if she was going to help her get back together with Emily right? She shakes her head, steeling herself as she continues making her way to the blonde that's now outright smirking.

She slows her pace as the brunette stands suddenly, her face worried as she walks towards the stairs. Violet frowns and stops when a familiar figure ascends down the last steps. The blonde joins the two girls, completely forgetting about Violet as she stares at the raven haired girl with a similar worried look.

The raven haired girl, _Emily, _gives her friends a weak smile as they ask her if she's alright. _That must be Spencer and Hanna then, _she guesses. Emily turns, her gaze landing on Violet. Their eyes meet and Violet knows she recognizes her. Emily starts walking towards her and Violet can tell in that moment why Paige is so in love with the girl. She's gorgeous, her features so strikingly beautiful, even with the puffy and red eyes; eyes that look so open and guarded at the same time. Her hair flows behind her like a cascading waterfall, each step sending waves through it until she stops in front of Violet.

"Where's Paige?" She asks, her voice struggling to sound demanding when it cracks with worry.

Violet glances at the confused girls standing behind Emily before she meets her eyes. She's suppose to help Paige and Emily get back together right? But she doesn't needs to make it easy for Emily. Paige was right when she said Emily could very well break her heart again, so she would make sure that it was Emily who fought for Paige, not the other way around. She shrugs, "She forgot her phone in her car. She didn't want to leave it there in case she got any other important messages. You know, messages that tell her the truth when you won't." Her voice has taken a sharp edge to it, and by the way Emily's jaw clenches she knows she hit a nerve.

"Look you don't know anything, so I would just keep my mouth shut if I were you."

Violet tries to appear nonchalant under Emily's intense gaze. "I know more than you think. I know that despite everything Paige has done for you, you've done nothing but break her heart." She looks away from Emily's wounded gaze when Spencer stands next to Emily.

"I would shut up if I were you." Spencer growls, her eyes gleaming dangerously.

"Why? Because I'm telling her the truth?" Violet spits back.

Spencer takes another step towards her, "I don't know who you are, and frankly I don't care, but Emily loves Paige, so you can just-"

Violet scoffs, "She thinks she can waltz back into Paige's life after everything that's happened and simply apologize to her for being a bitch, expecting Paige to take her back? She can't just tell her "Sorry, I still love you, take me back." When she's done _nothing _to back up those words." She turns to glare at Emily, who looks like she doesn't know whether to punch her or walk away. "You're sorry? Prove it. You still love her? Fucking show her! Because lying to her about you making out with Alison is no way to-" She clenches her jaw when Spencer shoves her back, the shorter girl standing face to face with her as she defends Emily, who clutches Spencer's arm in an attempt to pull her back.

"You don't know what you're talking about." Spencer snarls angrily, Hanna looking more confused than anything as she grips Emily's forearm.

Violet stares challengingly back at Spencer, never looking away as she ignores her comment, "Fight for her Emily. Because if you don't, you'll lose the person that loves you more than anyone ever will."

* * *

Paige stares at her phone as she approaches the dorm building, Alison's message glaring back at her. She shakes her head, annoyed that Alison still has the potential to make her doubt herself from 3,000 miles away. She deletes the message, tucking her phone into her back pocket as she opens the building's door with the other. Her eyes widen as soon as she steps inside. There are a lot of things she thought she'd never see; the scene in front of her is one of them.

Spencer and Violet are standing so close together that if it weren't for their deadly glares and Emily gripping Spencer's arm, it would look like they were about to kiss. _This is not good_. Spencer looks like she's about to slug Violet, who looks just as ready to fight and she knows Spencer doesn't stand a chance against Violet if things escalated.

Hanna's the first to notice her, the blondes eyes surging with relief as she walks behind Violet and grips her arm. She pulls the tense girl back, away from Spencer's fists, and meets Emily's eyes. "What's going on?" She demands, her eyes flitting to Spencer.

"Your friend here was just introducing herself." Hanna grumbles.

She frowns as Violet snorts and shakes off her hand. "Yeah. Spencer's a sweetheart."

"Okay that's enough Violet." She grips Violet's shoulder and hurries her towards the stairs when Spencer lunges at the Latina. She needs to get those two away from each other before they went all UFC in the lobby. "I think that's it for tonight."

Hanna stares apologetically at her as she steps aside to let them pass, her fingers brushing over Paige's arm.

Paige can feel Emily's gaze burning into her back and sure enough when she looks behind her she finds Emily staring at her. It looks like she wants to say something but Paige just gives her a sad smile, "We'll talk soon." She can see Emily's throat working as she swallows, but she just nods. Paige looks up the stairs but Violet's no longer in sight and she sighs. When she reaches her room she walks pasts it and heads for Violet's. She knocks but the door remains shut. "Violet can you please open the door." She presses her ear against the door, listening. "What happened down there?" She slumps against the door, "Violet come on." When there's still no response she sighs and trudges back to her room, collapsing onto her bed, wanting to drown in sleep and forget about everything for a while.

* * *

_Yeah so I hope you like it :) I had fun writing angry!Spencer haha let me know what you think :) your feedback keeps me going :)_


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